Having a baby is one of the biggest things most women’s bodies will ever go through in a lifetime. It’s the body’s job to change a lot during pregnancy to keep both mom and baby healthy, and – surprise surprise – things don’t just snap back into place when the baby is born.
Yet there’s a mounting pressure on new moms to instantly look as good as they did post-pregnancy, despite being faced with the tremendous task of looking after a newborn.
This isn’t helped by the fact that celebrities, who are more likely to have the money to spend on nannies and fitness trainers, go into hiding after giving birth, only to return 6 months later to the limelight with flat stomachs and not a single bit of cellulite to be seen.
The reality is, most moms aren’t going to be thinking about getting back “into shape” after giving birth, and that’s okay. Babies are incredibly demanding. If you’re up half the night attempting to breastfeed, it’s completely fine if you don’t feel like hitting the gym the next morning. In fact, you’d be an incredibly rare breed if you did.
There are all sorts of adjustments you’ll have to make after giving birth, even beyond the standard “recovery” time.
We’re all different, and there should be no rush to return to how we were before birth, if ever. Yet one new dad doesn’t seem to understand this.
The anonymous poster took to Reddit with a story about his wife’s, asking for advice – and his opinions have left the internet reeling.
In the post, which has since been deleted, the dad wrote that he and his family were having a small barbecue for memorial day, when his wife, who gave birth seven months ago, walked out in a bikini.
According to this so-called loving husband, things immediately became “awkward” because everyone was seeing his wife’s body in her swimsuit for the first time. He added:
“Everybody got a full view of her still pregnant looking stomach as well as very wrinkled and leathery looking skin.”
Continuing his story, the dad wrote that some of his family members became unnaturally disturbed by the sight of his wife’s bikini body, with his mom whispering that “a 40 year old woman in a bikini looked tacky.”
Things escalated further when the poster mentioned that his daughter was planning to take a family photo for Instagram.
Apparently, she said that her followers would be “disturbed to see what looked like the female version of saggy testes”. Instead of standing up for his wife, here’s what the dad did next:
“I pull my wife aside and ask if she could change into non pool going clothes or a one piece. She flips out at me and starts explaining how this body gave me a precious baby and made a general scene. She then storms off and we end up having to take the picture without her.”
It’s hardly surprising that along with his wife, everyone on the internet absolutely flipped out when they read the man’s post.
AITA for objecting to my wife’s bikini for family pictures? https://t.co/VNhFR267nD pic.twitter.com/AJYWDncqRi
— Am I the Asshole? (@AITA_online) May 30, 2020
He showed zero respect for the fact that his wife had given birth only seven months ago, even suggesting that she have a tummy tuck. On the original post, fellow Redditers were quick to jump to the man’s wife’s defense, with one person writing:
“She gave birth to a baby, your baby, oh woe betide someone wearing a bikini who doesn’t have a flat stomach and gravity defying tits after giving birth.
YTA and you know what, your daughter has 14k followers, who i can’t imagine is going to join a group body shaming session, since you allowed YOUR CHILD TO BODYSHAME HER OWN MOTHER! And you did it too, sorry a tummy tuck?”
Someone else responded to comments that the man was trolling, writing:
“Body shaming after birth is for reals though. So while it seems far fetched to you, it might actually be someone’s reality. I come from a fairly misogynist family and I have seen this kind of dynamics with the women in my family. After giving birth, everyone comments about the weight of the mother, and I have seen a few of them, my mom included, succumb to it and try extreme diets that have eventually got them sick.”
The post was shared to Twitter, where it received a similar reception.
Whether this was trolling or not, hopefully the poster now feels unanimously put in his place. Body shaming is unacceptable, especially when it involves a new mom. He should love her for who she is, and not for the shape of her stomach.
Please SHARE this with your friends and family.
