Gift-giving can be hit or miss.
That’s particularly true when you’re shopping for a spouse.
There are days that we give the simplest gifts, and then there are days where you might get diamonds.
Sometimes it’s a miss, and the other person won’t be too happy when they open it.
But have you given something to your spouse that ruined your marriage?
It’s a tough curveball
We know that sounds extreme, but that’s not impossible at all. Some spouses have gifted each other something thinking it is a great gift idea, only to find themselves loathing each other and having it affect their marriage.
This couple’s problems started with DNA
A wife bought her husband a DNA kit for his birthday.
She also bought one for herself, thinking it might be a fun and exciting gift they could do together on his birthday.
These ancestry kits are popular gifts nowadays. People seem to love tracing their genealogy. So, the couple’s result?
They discovered they’re first cousins.
The wife sought advice by sending out a letter to a Slate podcast called ‘Dear Prudence.’
She said that she and her husband grew up in a small town. They’ve been married for quite a while already.
They have a two-year-old son.
Since that shocking revelation, the couple started sleeping in separate bedrooms.
This also affected their son.
The entire thing put their marriage in ‘tatters.’ She also said she regretted buying that ancestry kit, seeing how things have worsened for both of them.
She shared that her husband didn’t want to discuss the matter.
They were thinking of all the possibilities that this test result has. It could be that his mom had an affair, and this is one reason she could think of why her husband didn’t want to talk about it.
He spoke highly of his mother, and ‘his father was always proud on how he married the first girl he ever kissed.’
The situation left them with an unsettling thought.
Is her husband’s father her uncle?
She cannot confide this to her mother or her siblings because it would disturb them and their entire family.
She said her uncles are happily married, and trying to dig something out might ruin the whole family.
The podcast host, Daniel Mallory Ortberg, and guest host Connor Goldsmith tried to give their best advice.
What advice could they possibly give?
Daniel said:
“You’re cousins. You’re not siblings. You didn’t grow up thinking of yourself as related. There are plenty of places around the world where people marry their first cousins, and it’s not considered that weird.”
On the other hand, Connor said that the couple would most likely continue to struggle, especially since there could have been someone in their family who could have warned them of this possibility before they got married. It’s a small town, after all.
The wife wanted couple’s therapy.
Her husband, on the other hand, is not so keen on it.
The hosts also suggested that she could go through therapy alone to seek advice on dealing with their problem.
What would you do if you were in their situation?
Please SHARE this with your friends and family.
