We’ve all seen those hilarious memes that give you a personality, appearance or predicted future based on your name or your birthday. While these memes are great, they’re nothing compared to this Instagram account – which is entirely dedicated to telling us all what dog we are based on our name.
These dogs aren’t the average pups you see taking a walk in the park. No, they all have something quirky about them. Something that makes them uniquely and surprisingly accurately illustrative of the person’s name they represent.
If you need a laugh in your lives, this slideshow will do it. Prepare to look out for your own name, and have a giggle in the process.
According to What Dog You Are, Madison is obviously a bit of a daredevil. Happy to dive teeth-first into an ice cream and not about to let brain freeze get in her way. You’d be wrong to mess with her – or worse, get between her and her food. She might look pretty, but she turns into something else when she’s hungry.
Ali was the most popular girl in the school, and you can’t even resent her for it. Chatty, bubbly, rich, friendly and kind to everyone, Ali somehow manages to look pretty pulling faces that would send people running in all directions if you were to copy her. Naturally, Ali became an Instagram influencer and part-time model for ASOS before even graduating from college.
If you happen to be named Joe Exotic, you think yourself of something of a showman; crowds love you, you’re a political role model, everyone wants to date you. You’re the next big celebrity, and honestly, everyone loves you. Yeah, your stripes might be painted on, or even photoshopped, but that’s okay – people are just as happy with a fraud as they are with the real thing.
What Dog You Are hasn’t been too kind to all the Marcuses out there. Apparently, Marcus is the sort of guy you can’t help but gasp at when you see – he’s really let himself go since his school days. He’s looking wrinkled in his thirties, and he seems to have forgotten to cut his hair… for the last seven years. He works at the local hardware store, and his DIY knowledge is pretty astonishing.
Audrey is a young auntie figure. She loves her nieces and nephews, though she hasn’t settled down herself yet – her dramatic tales of first dates with unsuitable men are the highlight of family get-togethers. While Audrey works in HR in an office by day, by night, you’ll find her looking a bit like this, with a glass of wine just out of sight and a Slimming World Diet Cola chicken marinading away in the oven.
We’re not sure whether this dog representative of Hope should be nicknamed “Hopeless”. She’s that girl who texts her friends to say she’s on her way, when she actually hasn’t even got out of bed yet. Don’t be surprised if she asks to borrow money from you to fund her grocery shop, because she spent all of last payday’s money on a new set of extensions. She’ll always pay you back, though – she’s loyal like that.
Danielle is the friend you need in your life while you’re at uni. Always willing to take your Instagram photos, she drives a cream-colored Fiat 500 or last year’s Range Rover, depending on the richness of her parents. You won’t find her far away from a Starbucks, where she orders a mocha skinny unicorn caramel light cream almond milk decaf latte every time.
Samantha’s just trying to fit in. She wishes there was a rule book for life, because it seems like everyone else has a grasp of their own destinies much more firmly than she does. When she’s not complaining about her job in retail, Samantha is busy attending “empowering” lectures by semi-famous local women and searching for “free career personality tests” online.
We all know a Matt that likes the simple stuff in life – the fresh air, the countryside, anything that’ll make him feel nice and relaxed and blissed out. His IT job couldn’t be more boring, but that’s fine, because he has his fun in the evenings. He’s not about that drama, which is why he only has one friend, who can often be seen heading into his house with a big bag of munchies.
Emma is a shy girl with a secret fun side. Catch her on camera and she’ll always look slightly nervous, but when she’s left to her own devices, she has a great time. Emma is the advice-giver in her friendship circle, and you can always count on her to brew you a cup of tea and run you a bath in her cosy one-bed apartment if you’re feeling down.
According to What Dog You Are, if your name is Sophia, you’re equal measures vain and self conscious. You’re the girl who can’t help pulling out a pocket mirror to check her lipstick hasn’t smudged – because nobody else will think to tell you otherwise. You buy the most extravagant dresses for parties and nights out, only to feel awkward and overdressed all night.
What Dog You Are’s representation of Hillary is pretty spot on. Hillary is the glamorous older lady who seems to have embraced ageing like nobody else could manage. From her designer specs to her deliberately-dyed silver hair, Hillary, now retired, spends her mornings eating salmon at fancy restaurants with her old coworkers. She leaves a whiff of her signature Chanel perfume wherever she goes, and often jets off to Africa, where she personally heads wildlife conservation programmes.
What Dog You Are believes Julia to be the sort of woman who can’t crack a proper smile unless you manually turn the corners of her mouth up with your fingers. One of Karen’s best gal pals, Julia makes political complaints on Facebook and doesn’t like mess in the kitchen. You’re most likely to find her staring out of a crack in her bedroom curtain, watching her neighbors.
Emily is a student who’s ready to call it quits. Nobody told her that college was actually code for “the end of life as you know it”. She’s up to her neck in assignments, she can’t remember the last time she ate a proper meal, and she secretly hates her roommate. She’s ready to drop out and pursue something a bit more “her” – like lifeguarding in Australia.
Jack is the cool dude around town. He learned to skateboard before all his mates, and now he’s the guy who hosts all the parties while his parents are away. He’s still at school, but likes to regularly boast about his drinking accomplishments to anyone who will listen. Any song by Blink 182 and Linkin Park is his jam.
We can’t exactly be certain what’s going on in this pic, but it still somehow sums Eric up pretty well. Often seen checking out his own reflection in the gym’s full-length mirrors, Eric never leaves home without a full bottle of protein shake. His Facebook photos are all dark, topless selfies with a moody aesthetic, and he’s famous amongst his mates for his ability to conquer his local town’s eating challenges.
Erin is very proud of her curves, and sees herself as a bit of a younger Amber Rose with hair. Her Instagram belfies, captioned “thicc” and “bored”, attract hundreds of likes on an hourly basis. But when you get to know the real Erin, you’ll know she’s really laid-back, and loves nothing more than a girly night in with a bag of Cheetos and the
Mamma Mia soundtrack.
Sam is the kind of guy who’s happy to go with the flow. He hates being forced into making a decision, and would rather do what everyone else is up for. He secretly misses the days of having his mom cook for him, and spends a lot of his time at his parents’ house because of it. He’s a good guy who often feels overwhelmed with life.
If you refuse to believe that you’re Julia, Karen’s best mate, What Dog You Are has given you another option. Julia #2 is sweet and innocent. She loves nature and wildlife, and is a passionate vegan. Her pale blue camper van, which she rents out to her neighbors for free in the summer, is adorned with stickers reading “I’m a herbivore” and “Animals are friends, not food!” She’s only been with her boyfriend for one year, but everyone knows they’re destined to get married.
According to What Dog You Are, Davis is best known for having a tough old exterior but being a complete softie on the inside. For a while, he was the scariest face about town, but then he had a daughter, and a dramatic change took place. These days, Davis is more likely to be seen carrying balloons at Disney World and singing nursery rhymes out of car windows. With his daughter in tow, of course.
If your name is X Æ A-12, you really are one of a kind. You’re the guy on the block that everyone knows, and even though you’re pretty rich, you make a thing out of dressing like a street kid. Nobody at boarding school would ever dream of getting on the wrong side of you, for you command the respect of your entire neighborhood.
If earlier Matt didn’t quite fit your description, you might relate more with the dog Matt on this image. Often found looking slightly resentful at work meetings, you secretly detest your job and wish you had what it took to invent something useful, sell it off for a couple of million, then spend the rest of your life on a yacht in Ibiza. You’re moody in the mornings, but love riding your bike on the weekends.
Emilie is that cute, bubbly girl that everyone wants to be friends with. She’s barely even 5 foot in height, but what she lacks in size, she more than makes up for in personality. You can count on Emilie to know all the words to the latest Taylor Swift song, remember people’s birthdays before the Facebook reminder, and hold spontaneous dinner parties at her house, where she cooks a full roast chicken.
The name McKenna actually means “son of the handsome one”, which is a bit offensive if you’re a girl. According to this doggo representation, McKenna is the type who takes Spring Break very seriously. You’ll probably see her at one of the hottest festivals of the year, with braided hair, lounging on an inflatable unicorn with a craft beer by her side.
Debbie, or “Deb” for short, is your office receptionist, and she’s always got the gossip. You can rely on Deb to keep up to 100 different peoples’ lives fully organised, and she’s been around for so long that she’s almost as much as the business’ staple figure as the boss himself. You’ll find her eating low-fat yogurt and talking about her daughter-in-law to anyone who happens to be passing her desk.
This representation of Kiki suggests that she’s easily frazzled after a day at work. She’s also the type of girl to show physical signs of stress, from wild hair to a red face and an inability to focus on one spot. Someone run the girl a bath.
Ava’s name share’s the same first letter as Ariana Grande, which obviously means that the two are essentially the same person. Ava’s bleach blonde hair is always in a high pony, and she wore a dress with an actual tutu to prom. Her boyfriends have all been three years older than her and wannabe rappers. She broke off with them because they just don’t get what she wants.
Morgan considers herself a fashion icon, and she sets all the trends in her local town before anyone else. She was the first to buy track pants, flip-flop heels, bike shorts and lingerie tops, and she’d like to think her influence encouraged others around her to copy her look. Kim Kardashian is her style inspiration, and she often tells story about that one time Kanye West walked past her at her local Trader Joe’s.
The Lauren in your life is a big joker. She will happily go out of her way to make you laugh, even at her expense, and not always intentionally. And no, that’s not a haircut – look again.
What Dog You Are paints a cutsey-pie picture of Maddie. She’s a girl who acts younger than her years, and is slightly horrified by the thirteen-year-olds of today. You’ll most likely find Maddie watching
Confessions of a Shopaholic, treating herself to an at-home spa day, or giggling at videos of dogs falling over on the internet.
Little Molly is the light of her parents’ lives. She’s the cutest toddler in town, and she always gets her way. Molly is used to being a little spoiled, but could anyone help it when she fixes them with her puppy dog eyes? When she grows up, she’ll be a definite handful, but her parents still have a few more years to enjoy her playful innocence before that happens.
Joy is the grandmotherly figure we all know. She divides her time between bird watching, holding voluntary craft classes for children, and taking solo vacations with coach travel companies. You’ll never see Joy upset – she always lives up to her name. At 60, she’s happily single, though she enjoys mingling with the men at her salsa classes.
According to What Dog You Are, if you’re a Ben, you’re the short, blonde kid that was part of that massive friendship group at school. Always ready with a wise crack, you became the class clown early on in your school career, and you find people who take life too seriously (i.e. teachers) a bore. You don’t have a clue what your future will look like, but who cares? Life is for living in the moment.
We all know a Kayleigh like this doggo. She’s pretty and she knows it, so it’s probably best to unfollow her on Facebook unless you want to see a selfie a day from yours truly. She recently acquired an exotic looking cat, which is just as beautiful as her, and the two can often be seen preening themselves in front of Kayleigh’s full-length mirror.
Kyle is that guy you see skateboarding past the beach at 3pm on the dot every day. He wears leather bracelets from his trip to Thailand four years ago, and he used lockdown as an excuse to grow his hair past his shoulders. When the weather’s nice, you’ll find him lounging on his mom’s front porch with an energy drink.
Harry and Selena are that couple that everyone seems to know. They call each other by their pet names in public, and celebrate every anniversary known to man – monthaversary, kissaversary, meetaversary, and so on. When you catch one of them alone, they’ll always start a sentence with “Harry and I” or “Selena and I”. They have a few couple friends, and always host the most well thought-out dinner parties.
If there was ever a studious guy in your class, he was named Michael. Usually going on to become a lawyer or a college professor, Michael was the only person who came to school wearing a suit. He walks around with a pen around his ear, has loud conversations with Siri, and has a secret passion for life drawing.
If your name is Khaled, What Dog You Are knows that you never take life too seriously. You love to play, even when the time isn’t appropriate – which has landed you in trouble more than a few times. You don’t care, though, because YOLO.
Natasha and Addison are two siblings who clash – badly. That’s not to say they aren’t the best of friends 50% of the time. But whether Natasha has stolen Addison’s favorite dress, Addison has stolen Sasha’s boyfriend, or both girls are staging a rebellion after mom has said “no parties”, there’s always drama to be had. They’ll look back at their teenage years and laugh, but for now, they’re too busy ghosting one another.
The Neil on this picture is pretty accurate to a lot of the Neils we know. Always complaining about his bad knees and back, Neil loves fishing and barbecues. He has an eighties horror movie collection and his job as a mechanic gives him permanently grubby hands. His hair might be greying, but Neil still has plenty of energy left in him.
Sarah is used to making light of a bad situation. She has mastered the art of the fake smile, and her life motto is “Oh well, it could be worse”. On the occasions that she moans privately to her cat, she always deeply regrets it the next morning. Sarah knows that life is short, and we’ve got to make the most out of what we’re given.
If you’re called Heather, What Dog You Are thinks you’re pretty old in your ways. You might only be in your twenties, but you’re already doing jigsaws, eating ham sandwiches on trips to the beach, and opting for lavender air fresheners for your bathroom. Your friends all love you for your down-to-earth advice and your endless stash of food in your purse.
What Dog You Are’s impression of James is that he’s the guy who always used to fall asleep sitting up in class. James now works in a factory, where everyone loves him even though he hardly says more than two words a day. You’re most likely to find him playing video games or stopping by at McDonald’s at midnight.
Lidia and Virginia are a summer mood. Besties for life, these two girls like to dress the same and take annual trips to Europe together with their matching suitcases. They have often been mistaken for sisters, and often call themselves “non-biological twins”. They’re always entertaining to bump into, though three’s a crowd when you’re with them.
If your name is Hannah, you often find yourself in compromising positions without understanding exactly how you got there. You’re always the person who ends up being the “novelty” character at a fancy dress party, while the rest of your friends stole all the beautiful and cool ones. In five years’ time, you’ll surprise everyone by starting your own ridiculously successful business and becoming a millionaire.
Jess and Jim are like the cute kids we always longed for. They’re happy to indulge you by dressing up in the outfits you bought for them, and while they might be cheeky rascals, they’re innocent at heart. Every moment is a photo opportunity with this brother and sister duo. Naturally, being the older sibling, Jess likes to take the limelight.
What Dog You Are portrays Max as a bit of a moody so-and-so. Quite frankly, he doesn’t have time for your words of advice. He just wants to hang out in his room, listening to music and making extensive plans for the future. Being an independent guy, no one can tell Max what to do. He’s on his own path, and he doesn’t appreciate being preached to – especially not by his mom.
Imari likes to share her healthy eating habits on Instagram, though her close family know the truth: she’s actually a sugar addict. The girl who poses with green smoothies and avocado on toast enjoys a good binge on her favorite junk food, but nobody has to know that – not when she’s known as #fitnessgoals by all her friends.
Ryan thinks that he’s a lot bigger and tougher than he actually is. He hangs out with the cool crowd, and he likes to talk about the “fights” he’s had in the past, but he’s really just an innocent guy. You’ll find Ryan walking at double-speed to keep up with his long-legged pals, or working on his “muscles” at the gym.
And finally… if your name is Aaron, What Dog You Are thinks you’re a totally chill dude who’s happy with the simple things in life. Food, the TV, your favorite gadget – they’re all you need. You’re super close to your friends and family, and everyone loves you for your laid-back attitude to life.
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