10+ “Polite” Habits Flight Attendants Actually Secretly Despise

Viral videos often showcase passengers being removed from planes due to disruptive behavior, but amidst the chaos, flight attendants remain calm. Problems arise when well-intentioned passengers unknowingly make the job harder for flight attendants by not understanding protocols or having a misguided perspective. If you’re wondering if you’ve accidentally crossed the line, you’re about to find out.

Enforcing the rules for other passengers

While it may be tempting to enforce flying rules, especially when others behave in irritating or dangerous ways, resist the urge to intervene. Flight attendants have noticed a shift, particularly during the COVID pandemic, with passengers attempting to enforce mask-wearing rules. However, regardless of perceived rule violations, it’s not your role to confront others, as doing so can lead to conflicts and fights, according to Ethan S., a flight attendant with six years of international experience.

Organizing the overhead bins

Erica L., a flight attendant with a major U.S. airline, mentions that, despite being on the smaller side, passengers often offer to assist her with lifting bags or organizing overhead compartments. While this is appreciated for personal luggage, she emphasizes that interference with other people’s belongings is not allowed. Erica recounts instances where passengers took items from her hands, reorganized carry-ons, closed compartments to “save” them, and removed bags they deemed inappropriate. This not only upsets fellow passengers but also creates chaos during disembarkation as both passengers and crew struggle to locate their belongings.

Tugging their sleeve to get their attention

Rather than calling out, some passengers opt for a more subtle approach by gently tugging on a flight attendant’s sleeve or elbow to get their attention, particularly in quiet or sleeping conditions, as noted by Ethan. While this may be considered more polite than whistling or snapping fingers, which he deems rude, flight attendants generally prefer not to be touched, even if the intention is gentle and polite.

Asking them to fill your reusable water bottle

Using a reusable water bottle is a commendable effort to address the environmental issue of single-use plastics, and flight attendants appreciate passengers taking responsibility. However, it’s not advisable to ask flight attendants to fill up large bottles, such as 32-ouncers. Tania highlights that planes are supplied with a limited amount of water, and it’s not feasible to fill up everyone’s water bottle as it could lead to a shortage for all passengers.

Serving yourself from the drink cart

If the flight attendant appears occupied with managing drink orders and the beverage cart is nearby, resist the urge to help yourself. Tania cautions against reaching into the cart prematurely, emphasizing that the crew pushes the cart down the aisle, and it will reach your row before they do. Attempting to grab items disrupts the serving system, risks contaminating contents, and can lead to confusion among passengers. Tania stresses that such actions cause chaos and upset neighbors who may wonder why you received a drink ahead of them.

Handing them a dirty diaper to throw away

While changing your baby’s diaper at your seat is discouraged, flight attendants often witness this, especially when lavatory lines are long. However, it’s crucial not to hand the dirty diaper to the flight attendant, as it is considered hazardous waste. Mac A., a flight attendant with 15 years of experience, emphasizes the inappropriateness of handing items with bodily fluids directly to the cabin crew.

Stowing your carry-on too carefully

Flight attendants appreciate passengers who board the aircraft prepared and attentive to stowing their bags properly, as noted by Erica. However, there’s a limit to being meticulous, such as spending too much time finding the perfect spot and arranging items meticulously. Prolonged stowing can lead to flight delays and frustration. Erica recalls an incident where a passenger insisted on keeping her luggage completely untouched by others and tried to reserve space with her arm. A compromise was reached by placing an airline blanket between her bag and the adjacent one.

Calling them over to chat

While flight attendants appreciate being seen as reliable sources of information and are happy to assist, it’s important for passengers to remember that they are there to help everyone, according to Ethan. Some passengers may call over flight attendants for a chat, thinking they don’t want them to “get bored.” However, Ethan reveals that flight attendants are consistently busy throughout the flight with various tasks that passengers may not be aware of.

Flirting with them

Flirting with flight attendants is not a charming meet-cute, according to Erica. She finds it surprisingly common and frustrating when passengers insist it’s a compliment. Tania adds that a persistent myth about flight attendants being “easy” leads some passengers to make inappropriate propositions, assuming it aligns with their desires.

Not letting them know you’re terrified of flying

While you might hesitate to share your fear of flying with a flight attendant, Mac emphasizes that your feelings are not a bother. Flight attendants are equipped with various techniques to help passengers calm down, especially during crucial moments like takeoff and landing. Mac expresses concern when witnessing someone silently struggling with fear and encourages passengers with severe flying anxieties to communicate their concerns to the flight crew. They are ready and willing to assist in making the journey more comfortable.

Throwing away other people’s trash

To assist flight attendants, a proactive step is cleaning up your own mess by gathering and properly disposing of your trash, according to Mac. However, it’s not as helpful to pick up your neighbor’s trash and dispose of it as well. While the intention is good, this can lead to unintended consequences such as throwing away important items like meeting notes, partially eaten snacks, or even valuable items like a wedding ring. In the best-case scenario, the flight attendant retrieves the item from the trash; in the worst case, they may have to search through multiple bags, causing delays for everyone on the plane.

Calling them by a term of endearment

Using terms of endearment like “darling,” “honey,” or “sweetie” may seem affectionate, but Tania, a flight attendant, emphasizes that it’s her biggest pet peeve. While such terms can sound sweet, they often come off as patronizing or flirtatious. Tania suggests thinking of it as akin to a client using a pet name during a meeting, which, at best, is jarring, and at worst, can be considered sexual harassment.

Thanking the pilot at the end of the flight

Erica finds one of the most satisfying parts of her job to be bidding farewell to passengers as they disembark. However, it becomes disheartening when passengers don’t acknowledge the gesture with a nod or wave. What’s even more disappointing for Erica is when passengers express gratitude to the pilot for a great flight but completely ignore the flight attendants who contributed to making the experience enjoyable for them.

Clapping After the Plane Lands

While some passengers think it’s a nice gesture, it can be seen as unnecessary and sometimes patronizing, as safe landing is expected and part of the pilots’ routine job.

Offering to Help Serve Drinks or Meals

Flight attendants are trained in specific service protocols and safety regulations, and passenger involvement can disrupt the flow and potentially cause safety or hygiene issues.

Insisting on Helping Other Passengers with Their Luggage

While the intention is good, it can lead to accidental damage or injury, and it’s best left to individuals or the flight crew who are trained to handle such tasks.

Overly Complimenting the Flight Attendants

Excessive compliments, especially about their appearance, can make flight attendants uncomfortable and feel like their professional skills are being overlooked.

Trying to Strike Up Long Conversations During Busy Times

Engaging in prolonged conversations can distract flight attendants from their duties and delay service to other passengers.

Constantly Using the Call Button for Non-Urgent Matters

Frequent use of the call button for minor needs can be distracting and prevents attendants from attending to more pressing duties or other passengers’ needs.

Refusing a Seat Change When Asked for Operational Reasons

While it might seem polite to stay in your assigned seat, sometimes shifting passengers is necessary for weight balance or other operational reasons.

Over-Apologizing for Needing Assistance

Excessive apologizing for requesting assistance can be unnecessary and time-consuming, as helping passengers is part of the flight attendants’ job.

Trying to Clean the Lavatories

Passengers attempting to clean lavatories can create sanitation issues and interfere with the flight attendants’ established cleaning procedures.

Insisting on Tipping the Flight Attendants

While the gesture might seem kind, many airlines have policies against accepting tips, and it can put the attendant in an awkward position.

Giving Personal Gifts to Flight Attendants

Personal gifts can create awkwardness and potential conflicts of interest, as flight attendants are required to maintain professional boundaries.

Offering to Share Personal Food Items with the Crew

Sharing personal food can create health and safety concerns, and flight attendants typically cannot accept food from passengers due to company policies.

Attempting to Assist with Safety Demonstrations

Safety demonstrations are a regulated part of the flight process, and untrained passenger involvement can lead to misinformation and safety risks.

Overly Thanking the Crew for Every Small Service

While gratitude is appreciated, excessive thanking can be overbearing and disrupt the flow of service.

Asking Too Many Questions About Their Personal Life

Inquiring excessively into a flight attendant’s personal life can be intrusive and uncomfortable, as they are there in a professional capacity.

Trying to Help with Technical Issues or Repairs

Passengers attempting to assist with technical issues can be dangerous and hinder the trained professionals who are responsible for addressing such matters.

Offering to Distribute Blankets or Pillows to Other Passengers

This can disrupt the service flow and create confusion, as flight attendants have a system for efficiently distributing items.

Insisting on Helping Wheelchair-Bound Passengers Without Training

Without proper training, well-meaning passengers could inadvertently cause harm or discomfort to those needing assistance.

Volunteering to Mediate Disputes Between Other Passengers

While it might seem helpful, intervening in conflicts between other passengers can escalate the situation and interfere with the crew’s trained conflict resolution procedures.

Trying to Assist with Boarding or Deplaning Processes

These processes are carefully managed by the flight crew for efficiency and safety, and unsolicited assistance can cause delays or safety issues.

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