The experience of pregnancy is indeed a magical journey, yet it can be marred by the frustrations caused by those around the expectant mother. Often, people make remarks that are entirely inappropriate. While their intentions might be to offer help or humor, these comments rarely come across as either to the pregnant woman.
“Wow, you are HUGE, are you sure it’s not twins?”
It seems that some people believe they gain medical expertise simply by glancing at a baby bump. This can be incredibly frustrating, leaving the expectant mother feeling undermined and as if she knows nothing about her own pregnancy. At times, it almost feels like these individuals think they are more knowledgeable than her doctor.
Sound familiar? If this is what you say to pregnant women, keep reading to learn what else not to say!
“You’re carrying low – it’s DEFINITELY a boy, I haven’t been wrong yet”
“Don’t bother with breastfeeding. Your nipples will never be the same”
“I’m here to tell you, you’ll go way past your due date”
“Childbirth is the worst pain you’ll ever experience. It’s so awful you won’t be able to handle it”
“Forget ever going to the movie theater again”
“You thing you’re tired now? Um, you have no idea what’s to come”
“You will never be the same again, no more jumping on the trampoline”
“I had relations the night before I gave birth”
“Want to know what giving birth is like? Passing a melon.”
“Aww, how cute, you’re waddling”
“You’re only 4 months along? Wow, you are going to be huge.”
“Once baby arrives, say goodbye to doing your hair or makeup ever again”
“So, what are having?”
“Just wait until you see how many stretch marks you will get.”
“Sleep now while you still can!”
Telling a pregnant woman to sleep now implies that she won’t get any rest once the baby arrives, which can add to her anxiety. Sleep patterns will change, but many parents find ways to adjust and get rest. It’s more helpful to offer support and practical tips for managing sleep with a newborn.
“You’re eating for two, so don’t hold back!”
Encouraging a pregnant woman to eat excessively can lead to unhealthy habits. It’s important for her to maintain a balanced diet for both her and the baby’s health. Supporting her in making nutritious choices is much more beneficial than promoting overeating.
“Are you sure you’re ready for this?”
Questioning her readiness for motherhood can undermine her confidence. Most expectant mothers spend considerable time preparing for their baby’s arrival. Offering encouragement and support, rather than doubt, is much more helpful.
“You look exhausted – are you getting any rest?”
Pointing out that she looks tired can make her feel worse about her exhaustion. Pregnancy can be tiring, and it’s important to acknowledge her efforts and offer practical help. Simple acts of kindness and support can make a big difference.
“Your hormones must be out of control!”
Highlighting hormonal changes can make a pregnant woman feel self-conscious and misunderstood. These changes are a natural part of pregnancy and it’s important to be empathetic and supportive. Offering a listening ear and understanding is more beneficial.
“Enjoy your last moments of freedom.”
Suggesting that her freedom will end after having a baby can be discouraging. While life changes with a new baby, many women find joy and fulfillment in motherhood. Encouraging her to embrace this new chapter with positivity is much more supportive.
“Are you going to have a natural birth?”
Asking about her birth plan can feel invasive and judgmental. Every woman’s birth experience is unique, and it’s important to respect her choices. Offering support and understanding, regardless of her plan, is the best approach.
“How much weight have you gained so far?”
Inquiring about her weight gain can make her feel self-conscious and stressed. Weight gain is a normal part of pregnancy, and it’s important to focus on her overall health and well-being. Encouraging her to follow her healthcare provider’s advice is more supportive.
“I hope you don’t get gestational diabetes.”
Mentioning the possibility of gestational diabetes can create unnecessary worry. It’s important to support her in maintaining a healthy lifestyle and to trust her healthcare provider’s guidance. Offering positive reinforcement is more helpful.
“Pregnancy brain is a real thing – you’ll be so forgetful.”
Pointing out potential forgetfulness can make her feel inadequate. While some women do experience memory lapses, it’s important to be understanding and patient. Offering practical support and reassurance is more beneficial.
“Are you planning on using cloth diapers or disposables?”
Asking about diaper choices can feel intrusive and judgmental. Every parent makes different choices based on their circumstances and preferences. Offering non-judgmental support and respecting her decisions is key.
“I hope you have a high pain tolerance.”
Suggesting she needs a high pain tolerance can increase anxiety about childbirth. It’s more helpful to share positive stories and information about pain management options. Encouraging her to discuss her concerns with her healthcare provider is supportive.
“You must be having a girl because you’re carrying all over.”
Making assumptions about the baby’s gender based on her appearance can feel intrusive and dismissive. Every woman’s body changes differently during pregnancy. Respecting her privacy and focusing on her well-being is more considerate.
“Make sure you don’t get too stressed – it’s bad for the baby.”
Telling her to avoid stress can ironically cause more stress. It’s important to offer practical support and understanding to help her manage any anxiety. Encouraging relaxation techniques and providing a supportive environment is more helpful.
“I hope your delivery isn’t as traumatic as mine was.”
Sharing traumatic birth stories can increase fear and anxiety. It’s better to offer positive encouragement and reassurance. Supporting her in preparing for a positive birth experience is much more beneficial.
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