Life is really unpredictable when you have kids. There can be times that you just love to cuddle them. And there can be times that you just can’t help but pull your hair out of so much frustration! They say the sweetest things, but they can say the funniest and the weirdest ones, too. Being a parent is SO not easy and we totally feel for these parents who took to Twitter so people would know just how funny kids can be.
Here are 65 funny tweets parents have tweeted that their kids have said.
Children can be really bossy. They are honest and just tell things as they see them. Sometimes, they hit the mark but most of the time, they miss the point, just like this kid who definitely thinks her Dad is a spider killer.
When you were younger, you probably thought that good looks were a major factor in finding your special person. Now that you have kids, all you need is someone who will help you clean up the mess your kids made. So when this Mom heard about her daughter’s crush being good at cleaning, she approved of him right away!
Kids can bring up the strangest topics. This toddler apparently wanted to talk about something no one expected, even his mom: compost.
Sometimes, kids can be so hyperactive that they end up having violent tendencies if left unchecked. It’s a parent’s duty to reprimand kids who misbehave, but sometimes their threats of violence are just so funny that parents simply have to share them!
Yes, this can be seen as funny, but we certainly can’t ignore the feeling of sadness when our kids finally learn to bring other people into their lives. This mom’s tweet certainly sums up that inevitable moment.
When you become a parent, always keeping an eye on your children becomes a natural thing. Apparently, watching over them does not only include looking after them as they eat, but as they poop as well!
We can’t agree more to what this kid said. But, no matter how annoying kids can be, we still love them more than what we can imagine.
Children can be really confusing. They tell you to do something and when you do, they yell at you for doing exactly what they told you to!
A child is a person who is quite literal with their thoughts. That’s probably why when this kid put his phone on airplane mode, he seriously thought it would fly!
When it comes to pets, kids always know their priorities. They always, ALWAYS put their furry friends first! They are even willing to let their Dad out of the house just as long as the kitty stays inside.
Although kids are quite annoying and frustrating at times, there can be moments where they show just how sweet they are. These moments will make you realize how blessed you are for having a child in your life.
12. How did you know it wanted that?
Apparently, kids are not only made of sweetness and hilarity, they are also weird. This Mom must have realized this when she heard her boy say those words she shared on her tweet. You gotta make sure he doesn’t do what his “wiener” wants him to do, Mama!
13. Talk to the fish, Mom
Can anything be weirder than this? If that fish answered me while I was on speaker phone with it, I would totally freak!
14. When you are raising ladies
Little girls are cute, especially if they want to get away with things. But, when they are in the mood to be nasty, they are quite the piece of work!
There are things that when a kid says them, the words become sweet. But when a kid talks about a plane crash and you are in that plane, that is nothing but creepy and terrifying!
When a child asks you to do something, they pout adorably and give you that cute and adorable face that you can’t say No to. They know they have the advantage, and you fall for their sweet smile every single time.
Some kids just know how to hustle, especially at Christmas! These days, they don’t prefer surprise gifts anymore. Just give them money and they will buy the toy they want.
Kids have a weird way of telling things. Most of the time, you really need to listen and pay attention to find out what they mean.
When your kid asks you about random things and ultimately tells you not to mind what he said, you better be ready to find something you would either love or hate. It’s the same thing as when the house suddenly goes quiet, that’s the time that you really should be worried because your little one is probably up to something!
Sometimes, you feel like being the wise adult and you let your children know what to expect in life. You don’t always get the response that you want, but they sometimes give the response that you need!
21. Pretty descriptive child
There can be kids who say things in the most bizarre ways that parents need to really take the time and understand what they mean. However, there are also kids who are so good at describing things that you can immediately picture what they want you to know!
22. When your child is too honest
Kids are quite notorious for being overly honest. The painful part is that they always say the truth because they say things exactly as they see them.
23. When your kid wants more
Giving incentives for behaving properly is a proven way of keeping kids in line. But, when you fall short on the rewards that you give them, be ready to face their tantrum!
Can we emphasize more on the fact that kids say the weirdest things? They say stuff that does not make sense and you end up realizing that you put so much thought on some random thought they voiced out loud!
If you think your two little toddlers are quite a handful, try and become a grade school teacher! Being with a bunch of little kids, even for only a few hours a day, can easily zap the energy out of you.
Being a parent does not only require patience. You also need to have a strong heart! Kids can say the most shocking things like they are just telling you about the weather.
Kids may be strange but they all have one thing in common: they know what they want. This kid wants his younger sibling to be Batman, and he is totally sure of it!
28. Where did that come from?
This is when you’re just trying to test your kid’s knowledge and you end up being perplexed with their answer! Kids have the most bizarre train of thought.
29. “I’m going to touch knives”
We find it cute when kid imitate adults. Their adorable way of saying things can be really funny and takes all the stress away after a long, hard day.
When kids speak their mind, adults need to listen. They see things in an unfiltered manner, and their innocent honesty can be both endearing and hilarious at the same time.
31. Who invented homework anyway?
This child’s sentiment is something that even adults, who were once children, can totally relate to. Who invented homework anyway? Life is so much better without it!
32. Be careful what you say around children!
When kids are young, they mostly learn through imitation. If you are around these kids, be sure to say only the right things because they sometimes echo words they don’t even understand.
33. What’s the difference?
Do you know one of the hardest parts of being a parent? It’s when your kid asks you about something and you’re left in a corner trying to figure out how to respond.
If this Mom’s tweet will not make you laugh, then I don’t know what will. Hearing your kid say this will not only shock you, it will leave you howling in laughter as you pray for the opposite to happen.
35. Glow sticks in the tub
Children are eternally curious! They want to try all sorts of things, most of them are hilarious stuff you never would have heard otherwise.
Oh, how innocent kids are! Even the cemetery becomes a garage sale for a child who sees a lot of people gathered for a funeral.
37. This kid is all of us
This kid’s sentiment sums up our woes as adults. Sometimes, being an adult is so stressful that you can’t decide if you need a hug, a bottle of your favorite wine or two months of sleep!
When a kid wants something, they will do and say everything just to make Mom say Yes. They simply know what words to say to get their way!
This kid is not making sense at all. But, he did prove one point. Something does not have to make sense for it to be funny.
40. My thoughts, exactly!
Here’s another fact that children say the most basic truths in life if we only listen to them. Periods on weekends? Unbelievable.
41. Just an innocent question
An adult asking these kinds of question may look pretty dumb. But, when a kid does it, it sounds funny!
Children get carried away, too. If anything, kids get carried away a lot because they always have their hearts on their sleeves. Even Twinkies can trigger the dreamer in them!
Toddlers are quite vocal, and totally dramatic when they feel anything that frustrates or angers them. They will not hold back and tell you exactly how you ruined their lives!
44. Just concerned about his Dad
The way kids tell you they love you is not always by saying it out loud. Sometimes, the mere fact that they follow you around is proof enough of how much they want to be with you.
45. That’s one way of saying it
This kid surely knows his biology even at such a young age. I just wonder where he could have heard that?
46. Too honest for their own good
Have you ever had an experience where your kid says something so honest about someone and you’re left with nothing but pure horror? When you have a really honest kid, you might want to re-consider bringing them into public places without prepping them about how they should keep their mouths in check.
Parents can only wish that they know exactly what their kids are thinking. Children make the most bizarre comments and they even compare things using perplexing analogies.
Some kids really know what to say to win an argument. They are like little lawyers who always know how to reason out!
49. Kids don’t care what you’re doing if they need anything
When you become a parent, you must get accustomed to the fact that you no longer have personal space. Your kid is always a few inches from where you are and no matter where you hide, they will always find you.
As a parent, you can’t help but feel proud when your kid volunteers to answer a rather difficult question. But, if this is how your kid answers, would you still feel proud or would you be horrified?
51. A usual conversation among kids
When parents hear their kids exaggerating, they can’t help but feel weird about it and tell them to stop being so over the top. But, when kids talk to each other, exaggerating is the norm!
52. Kids can be creepy sometimes
You might want to be more aware when your kids are saying these kinds of things. They can be funny, but they can be downright creepy, too!
We’re not sure about how this kid came to know what horse slobber smells like, but we’re guessing it’s not something too nice for your nose. Kids may use the weirdest comparisons, but when they say you smell bad, that means you really do smell bad!
54. When your kid tries to get away with his naughtiness
As parents, we need to be firm with our kids and discipline them when they do something wrong. However, we still can’t stop ourselves from laughing secretly when they try to get off the hook.
This Mom’s post shows how even children are aware of everybody’s role in the family. Who gets the task of noticing Mom’s new hair? It’s Dad, not the kids!
Kids blurt out the most unexpected things and parents are often left horrified by what they hear from their little ones. A seven-year-old is not supposed to say those words and his Mom was shell-shocked with what he said. Apparently, he did not expect he’d say those words as well.
Honesty is something that kids are totally notorious about. They tell things the way they want to, without filters and without care if they are grossing other people out!
58. Too young to realize things
Apparently, kids can sometimes say words that totally belong to a grown-up. Asher, you’re too young to man up and get a job. Now, be a kid and go play with your friends.
This little boy just said what everyone always wishes were true. If every day was the weekend, the world would be a happier place.
This is totally hilarious and genius! If Dad just started yelling earlier, they would have started to move faster before it was too late.
Sorry, Peyton. The Easter bunny poops, yes. But, sad to say, they aren’t jelly beans.
This is when you try to comfort your child and they roast you in return. This Mom was burned by her innocent toddler and it is absolutely hilarious!
Kids choose to say the most shocking words at times. This boy did not only have a big poop. He had a big “hang” and his Mom was probably howling with laughter when he said that.
Hearing these words from a kid may be strange, but it is definitely funny! Kids are totally oblivious when they say the most hilarious things and parents are left laughing their butts off.
Children will always have an imagination that is beyond what their parents can fathom. When every kid on the block wants to be an astronaut, this kid despises being one because of space worms!
Being a parent may not be easy, but having these lovely little angels who bring fun and excitement in your home is definitely worth all the hardships. They can be cute, adorable and really hilarious without even knowing! At the end of the day, parenting is worth it.
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Source: Bored Panda
