To have kids or to not have kids, that is the question. For many people, having kids is an essential part of life, with some even going as far to say it’s the entire meaning of life. For others, however, the idea just isn’t appealing at all.
A recent Reddit thread asked older people and couples without kids whether or not they had any regrets, and the replies inspired some interesting debate…


1) Regrets
Some people, like this woman, get so caught up in their careers that they just don’t feel like the time is right for having kids.
But you can spend your whole life waiting for that “right moment”.


2) Nope
Some people believe that everyone will want kids eventually.
However, this simply isn’t true. There are some people who just never want kids for one reason or another.


3) Regrets On Both Sides?
According to this woman, it’s more likely to encounter people who regret having children than those who don’t.


4) Freedom
Many people who don’t have children enjoy more freedom to do what they want.
This couple have more money and free time to travel around, for example.


5) Ups And Downs
As this person clearly states, there are pros and cons to being a parent.
Watching them grow up and learn new things can be wonderful, but you also have to think about the expense and other aspects.


6) The Best Decision
Some are completely adamant that they made the right choice in not having kids.
For these people, there are no regrets whatsoever.


7) A Sad Story
One of the most touching replies to the Reddit thread came from this person.
They told a story of a couple who initially didn’t want kids, later changed their minds, but found themselves unable to get pregnant.


8) You Do You
As this person implies, it’s important to remember that having kids is a major life choice, but it’s also a very personal one.
Some people want children, others don’t, but either way, it’s important that you’re the one to make that choice.


9) Kids Cause Divorce?
This Redditor floated the idea that children can be linked to divorce.
In actual fact, statistics show that the divorce rate for couples with kids can be up to 40% lower than those without.


10) Other Options
As this Redditor points out, there are other options for couples who don’t have kids.
Lots of children are in the foster system, while many others are waiting to be adopted.


11) No Desire
Some people just don’t feel that same ‘desire’ to have children that others feel.
This poster spoke of the “peace, freedom, quiet, and clean” aspects of life they can enjoy without kids.


12) No Way!
This 39-year-old was very clear on their view.
This post shows just how extreme some people’s opinions can be on the subject.


13) The Greatest Thing
This poster stood out from the rest as they actually do have children, despite not wanting them earlier in life.
The last line sums it all up: “I still don’t like kids, but mine are the greatest thing in the world.”


14) From An Early Age
Many people go back and forth on the idea of having kids all through their lives.
This poster, however, claimed to have made the big decision when they were a child themselves!


15) Zero Urge
This poster made up their mind by the age of 21.
Like many childless people, they believe that having a child would ruin or disrupt their current quality of life.


16) A Voice In The Back Of The Head
Some people in the thread clearly had no regrets at all about not having kids.
This poster, however, admits that they always have a little voice in their mind wondering about what might have been.


17) Not At All
While some people can doubt their decisions, others know they made the right choice.
This individual has no regrets whatsoever.


18) A Selfless Act
This post was a particularly interesting one, written by a woman married to a man with health issues.
The couple worried that their child might inherit the health problems, and they didn’t want to put their potential child at such a risk.


19) Simple
Some posters in the thread didn’t need to write a big explanation.
They’re happy with their choice and confident they made the right one.


20) And Again
Just like the last poster, this individual was very clear.
They know they made the right choice.


21) A Drug?
This poster just doesn’t see the appeal of having children or even spending time with them.
They even make the argument that nature ‘drugs’ people into liking kids.


22) Only 18
As we’ve seen, some people make this big decision very early in life.
This poster is only 18 but already knows for sure that they don’t want children, even though they think they might regret it someday.


23) Soon To Be Snipped
Those who definitely don’t want kids can choose to take some ‘preventative measures’ to ensure it never happens.
That’s what this poster has decided to do, calling it the “best decision I’ve ever made in my life”.


24) No Plans
This poster also spoke of seeking out a vasectomy.
After all, even if you don’t want children, accidents can sometimes happen.


25) Every Day
Married for nearly two decades, this couple know for sure that they don’t want kids.
They apparently talk about it “almost every day”.


26) Parenting…
This poster doesn’t need to use many words to sum up a lot of people’s attitudes towards being a parent.
Being a mom or dad has its magical moments, but there are also some problems that come along with the job.


27) Lazy Lifestyle
A common theme throughout the entire Reddit thread was the idea of people not wanting to change their lifestyle.
This couple want to live their life in their own way, free of any interruptions or interferences from kids.


28) Zero Regrets
This woman says she has no desire to be a mother, whatsoever.
Not only that, but she claims to look younger than other women her age, so has ‘zero regrets’ about the decision.


29) No Looking Back
Asking a partner whether or not they want children someday is a key question, and it can break up some relationships.
Fortunately for this man and his girlfriend, they both have the same opinion on the matter.


30) Mental Illness
Sometimes, we have too many of our own problems to deal with and simply aren’t ready to raise a child.
This poster opened up about their own mental illness and anxiety, not wanting to burden another human being with all of those issues.


31) Constantly Reassured
This couple, in their early 50s, state that they have no regrets whatsoever.
They go on to say that they are “constantly reassured” about their decision, letting them live their life to the fullest without wondering what it might have been like with little ones.


32) Controlling The Population
Some people have rather unique reasons for not wanting kids.
This woman cites the fact that she’s helping to control the population as a positive point in her decision.


33) I Just Don’t Like Kids
Kids aren’t for everyone. Some of us find them cute, funny, and adorable.
Others don’t.
This poster, who passionately writes “I JUST DON’T LIKE KIDS” definitely falls in the latter camp.


34) Always Known
This poster seems to have known right from the start that they didn’t want to be a mom.
But, at the end of their post, they remind everyone to live their own lives and never feel pressured.


35) You Can Change Your Mind
Over time, as we grow older and our lives change in unforeseen ways, our attitudes can change too.
This poster reminds us that the way we feel about having children as a teen might not be the same as how we feel in our 20s or 30s. “Never say never”.


36) A Big ‘No’
Not only does this poster say that he has no regrets about having kids, he also states that many parents would probably choose not to have them if they could go back in time and do things differently?
Agree? Disagree?


37) The “Cool” Aunt And Uncle
It’s not because you don’t have any kids of your own that you can’t enjoy their company and still have a big family.
This couple don’t want children but they like to be the “cool” aunt and uncle to their nieces and nephews.


38) Money, Money, Money
This couple, like many others, spoke of the huge financial advantages of not having children.
They say that they can enjoy trips away that they wouldn’t be able to afford with kids and get to lead the lives they want, playing video games and enjoying tasty food.


39) Parental Regrets
This man owned up to having some regrets about having a child and step-child of his own.
He calls having kids a “selfish decision” and says he often thinks of how much easier and more fun his life might be without them. Let’s hope his kids never read that Reddit post!


40) Step-Children
Sometimes, even if we don’t want children of our own, we fall in love with someone who already has them.
That’s what happened to this woman, who seems to be happy enough as a ‘part-time’ parent.


41) The Older You Get…
Step-children were mentioned a few times throughout the thread.
This poster has 3 step-kids, and many people enjoy spending time with step-children, even if they never wanted biological kids of their own.


42) The Bills
Having a child is a huge responsibility, and you need to be ready in every possible way: mentally, physically, and financially.
This poster says they simply can’t afford to have kids and don’t want them growing up in a poor family.


43) The Best Of Both Worlds
It seems like this poster has the best of both worlds. He works as a teacher and happens to be an uncle too, so he gets to spend time with children and have fun with them.
Then, when he wants to do his own thing, he has the freedom to pack his bags and head off on a camping trip.


44) A Simple Life
Many people throughout the thread mentioned the fun and exciting lives they were able to lead without children.
This poster says they only have a “simple life”, but are perfectly happy without children and never wanted any at all.


45) Not Even For An Hour
Some people just aren’t good with kids and don’t like to be around them.
This poster doesn’t even like to spend a single hour babysitting other children, so they would probably struggle as a parent!


46) We’ll Never Know…
This poster responded to the question in quite a deep and philosophical way, saying that the only way to truly know whether or not our lives would be better with or without kids is to lead two lives.
It’s physically impossible, of course, but the poster has a good point. We might think we’re better off with/without kids, but can we ever be completely sure?


47) Rub It In
This poster is perfectly happy without children.
In fact, they’re so pleased with their decision that they like to “rub it in” to parents they know.


48) Easier With Time
Some people who choose not to have kids constantly have to deal with criticisms and “grief”, as this poster puts it, from people who are parents.
It’s important for parents and non-parents to respect each other’s opinions.


49) Friends With Kids
Continuing the message from the last post, another poster commented on how hypocritical some parents can be.
One moment, they say that a life without kids must be a ‘dream’, and the next, they start talking about what a big mistake it is.


50) Understanding Both Sides
This person does have kids but admits that they can understand exactly why some people choose not to.
This is the best attitude to have; letting everyone be free to make their choices and feel fine about them.


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51) Wonder
This poster does have kids and, like plenty of parents out there, does wonder from time to time how life would be without them.
They argue that having more freedom and money would be nice, but can’t replace the love and care of family.


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52) Everything Is A Risk
This poster makes a very important point.
Regrets are always possible in life. We can regret all kinds of things, but that’s just a part of how life works.
We take risks and make decisions and then see what happens, making the best of the situations we find ourselves in.


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53) The Plan
This poster wrote about how so many people seem to think that life needs to follow a set plan: go to college, get married, have kids, etc.
They smartly state that kind of life isn’t for everyone, and it’s definitely not a good idea to have kids just because you feel like you have to.


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54) Other Options
This Redditor kept their post short and simple, highlighting the other options available for people who choose not to have biological kids but might still want a child later in life.


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55) An Uncomfortable Feeling
This poster shared a personal story, revealing that their own mother had admitted to wondering how life might have been without children.
It’s a touching tale, especially as the poster talks about how “the ship sailed on a lot of her dreams while she was raising kids.”


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56) Doing Things Differently
This poster brought up an old “Ask Ann Landers” column from the Chicago Sun Times in which parents were asked if they might do things differently.
Apparently, a lot of them said they would choose not to have kids if given the choice.


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57) A Dark Place
This poster makes an important point as well.
They state that feeling too much regret can take people to a “very dark place”, so many of us prefer to simply believe that we have no regrets and not think too deeply about it.


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58) A Contradiction
This Redditor brought up an interesting contradiction.
Once again, this shows the ups and downs of parenting and how there really isn’t just one “right answer” when it comes to having kids.


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59) No Quality Of Life?
This poster responded to someone who had accused parents of having no quality of life.
They argued against that idea, saying that since they welcomed their own “little guy” into the family, they feel so much happier and more fulfilled.


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60) You Never Know
Finally, this poster summed up a lot of thoughts and ideas that had been brought up throughout the thread.
They stated that when it comes to kids, it’s better to regret not having them than having them, while also stating that children are always going to be a risk and you never quite know how they might turn out someday.


And there we have it, a lot of interesting takes on the subject of having children.
Ultimately, deciding to be a parent is a truly life-changing decision, and everyone needs to think carefully before making such a big call.
Having kids clearly isn’t for everyone, but that’s okay. As one poster said: “you do you”.
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