What a lot of people don’t realize with technology is that sending a text doesn’t always convey the exact message you want to get across.
The weight or the meaning can change depending on the reader’s mood or comprehension, and more often than not, an exchange turns unpleasant.
So here are texts from the snarky, the sarcastic, and the technologically inept for you to enjoy. Let’s begin!
No, this is not a pregnancy test, dude.
Maybe the reader doesn’t know what a pregnancy test looks like, so that means he or she is single.
But 100.4? Perhaps they took it to mean the sender is 100.4% pregnant?
Did He Sell the Car Though?
When putting a “for sale” ad on a car, the goal is of course to sell the car.
But life does find a way, and this situation could even lead to an unexpected friendship. This sweet bromance blossomed right in front of our eyes.
The scene is set, traffic is in place, and the sticker is in full display for the right person.
Now picture them having a beer and watching the Superbowl together. That’s beautiful.
Technically It’s Not Even English
English is hard. It’s not its own language since it’s a collage of four other languages.
And that’s why spelling is inconsistent. Just like tough and though. They don’t even rhyme!
And then you have the many ways of pronouncing “ough”.
No other language has a spelling system confusing enough to justify nationally televised spelling bees.
So you can’t blame this guy for spelling croissant the way he hears it. And it’s not like the original French spelling is super phonetic either.
Sign Us Up
Nobody likes missionaries. Other people trying to sell stuff or make you believe in stuff can get annoying.
But after seeing this text exchange, we’re willing to make an exception. Does this religion take new applicants? Who do we speak to?
This cat with its baton can preach to us and we’ll give it our full attention.
Let it lead us in prayer in the hopes of having nine lives.
Not everyone loves cats but we’d definitely pay a visit to this house of worship. Don’t forget to genuflect.
Phone Alone
This surprise pun hit us in the face. Okay so more like a hard fall where we bruised our knees.
We like it though as puns are welcome in any way, shape, or form.
Bet you the person behind the gray text bubbles facepalmed the moment they got the punchline.
Props to the person who sent this for figuring out the only way to connect American rapper Post Malone to Hollywood’s most troubled kid, Macaulay Culkin.
I Said What I Said
Sophie’s prom date wants to know if he is doing the right thing. A prom date’s duties are to wear a suit, pick her up, give her flowers, and share a dance.
But there was a chance here that those flowers would be swapped for something else.
Sophie doesn’t realize how lucky she is. It’s customary for girls to wear a corsage given by their dates for prom, but she could have gotten something way better.
Pastries over flowers anytime, anywhere. Take those carbs, Sophie, and hold on to that man.
Creep Alert
Walking outside at night isn’t a very pleasant experience when you’re alone. It’s dark and scary plus there are lots of weird noises.
It’s like being in a horror movie without a script or a stunt double.
To feel safer, people use their phones and speak to a friend, via texts or even phone calls.
But this case is one of the rare occasions where a text didn’t make the nightwalker feel safer.
It just made them feel worse, so no thanks. This person will stay indoors with Netflix next time.
You Can’t Handle the Truth
The stuff you find when you go antiquing. Little pieces of history, trinkets from days of yore, horse-shaped high heels…
All so intriguing so you have to send a picture of your treasured findings to people you know, even if it irks them.
Imagine checking your phone, seeing this picture, and then opening the message to this.
We wouldn’t wish it on anyone but if this horseshoe is true, then we’d rather be living a lie.
Nyoom
Here’s a next-level move. While there are entries of kids changing words to other words on their parents’ phones, this one takes the cake.
One very devoted kid spent a lot of time with his or her mother’s phone and there really was no holding back.
With expertise and diligence, the kid changed as many words as possible to “Nyoom.”
Honestly, every word he could think of. This kid was beyond bored. Does he not have hobbies?
Punctuation Please
Asking for punctuation is too much actually. Noah had a smokey adventure and we are impressed he could even type.
Maybe autocorrect was involved, but what exactly did he smoke and how much of it? Does he have any left, ’cause we’ll come visit with snacks.
Noah, you’re not in the way of anything. But at least you have enough mobility to ask a friend.
Good to know his friends can be relied on during such a challenging time.
Just Let Her Sleep
It’s a couples’ thing to message each other good night at the end of the day. You want your significant other to know you care and that you think of them before sleeping.
It’s kind of adorable. Until one of them decides they are in the mood for a different bedroom activity.
But Sarah has a funny way of showing she’s into sleeping more.
It’s also a great way to hint to him about the dirty dishes in the sink.
Gotta Love Liz
Everyone has that joke when meeting someone for the first time.
Somehow, people think they’re the first to come up with “Oh, you’re Frank? I’m honest, nice to meet you.”
“Oh, Rob, I’ll give you everything in my bag, just don’t hurt me.”
Bloody original. Now get out of the way.
But not Liz. She sounds like a real stand-up gal who must have heard the lizard joke so many times. And she’s still in good spirits about it.
Drunk Jess
You are never yourself when you’re drunk.Though you can be a better version of yourself since you are not as scared.
You also show more love, plus you speak your second language better. If alcohol made us smarter we’d never be sober again.
Take Jess here. Her drunk self took it upon herself to make lunch for her sober self.
Now that’s self-care. The thing is, she doesn’t really think things through, because she’s drunk.
But we all appreciate her kind intentions.
Chicken for Dinner?
With so many little windows to type into, it’s no surprise older users get confused. You have the Google search bar, regular text messages, notes app, and Facebook Messenger.
Mom could use help. She is making chicken for dinner. Or buying it?
No one knows but chicken is involved. Oh, and there’s avocado.
Chicken guacamole sounds fantastic. Does mom mind setting up an extra plate?
We’ll repay her kindness by showing her the difference between texting and googling.
Honestly, Same
Oreos are sweet heavenly cookies. They’re the sugary sandwichy snacks of the gods.
Who would have thought that there was a way of making them even better? Oreo cereal proved that anything is possible if you set your mind to it.
Except we don’t see those anymore. Where have they gone? Is it a popularity issue?
Someone needs to crack that case, and that someone is Sierra. She’s a girl that has her priorities straight.
Cookies before pookies is our motto. Anyone who doesn’t prioritize Oreos doesn’t belong with Sierra.
Grandma’s iPhone
Leon is an exemplary grandson when he heard that Grandma got a new smartphone.
He knows these devices can be confusing for the elderly so he offered some help. Leon was even quick to offer encouragement upon learning that Grandma’s dexterity needed practice.
It does look like Grandma is going to need a lot of help. Unless Oklahoma is code for something.
That’s the phone’s autocomplete for sure. Right?
Pecan Pie Means Pecan Pie
It’s that classic prank of a kid swapping a word for a different word on their parent’s phone.
Simple, funny, and, and easy enough to reverse without causing damage. Unless the parent was texting their boss.
This parent could have had it a lot worse though.
If this kid was prone to profanities, it could have taken a really dark turn. All it did was raise the probability of bringing home pecan pie.
Green Beans and Ham
Here’s a wild text exchange with lots of questions and almost no answers in sight.
Just how cheap are green beans? With a self-explanatory name, how come the recipient does not know what they are?
And where can those magic beans be found? Who is the bean connoisseur?
Let’s be self-sufficient with this one.
In order of appearance: $1.50, the person is color blind so they don’t know what green looks like, Walmart, and probably a secret admirer.
Cereal Buzzkill
Cole wanted some late-night loving but his girlfriend wanted something else entirely.
She’s talking sugary and milky. She was in bed, but it wasn’t the same activity as Cole had in mind.
Cereal is sweet, comforting, easy to make, and you can have it in bed. It works for any time of the day. Or night.
We see her point, and frankly, we’ll take a bowl of cereal over some random person on our phone anytime.
Nugget for Your Thoughts
Our parents taught us everything. How to use the bathroom, how to dress, how to eat with a fork… you know, the basics.
Perhaps that’s why kids find it so amusing to find out there’s something their parents don’t know.
Hopefully, growing up will teach them to be more compassionate and even teach their parents a thing or two of more modern skills.
Like how to send an email and how to use Postmates. Or how to manipulate a phone’s keyboard.
Please SHARE this with your friends and family.