Life
9 strange and eye-opening tidbits about physical intimacy in the Wild West
'Wild' is an understatement. 👀
Jenny Brown
11.08.23

Step right up, folks, and let me spin you a yarn about the Old West, a place where cowboys and six-shooter showdowns loom large in our collective memory.

But hold your horses, because there’s more to this tale than just outlaws and sheriffs.

You see, the whispers of romance and the heart’s longing also echoed through those dusty streets, though such stories aren’t as often told.

Why, you ask?

Well, it’s simple: the details of love and longing in the land of tumbleweeds are as scarce as water in a desert.

But fear not, for there are still some tantalizing tales of love and passion that survive from those bygone days.

And let’s not forget, the world’s ‘Oldest Profession’ was alive and well, adding its own chapter to the saga of the Wild West.

So, saddle up as we take a ride through the lesser-known, intimate trails of America’s frontier history.

The Wild West was a tapestry of tales, and among them, the story of sex workers weaves a complex pattern.

Sex workers were common during this time.

These individuals were as much a part of the frontier towns as the saloons and the general stores.

Now, let’s set the scene: the diversity in the world of the Old West’s pleasure-seekers was as vast as the plains themselves.

In some corners, you’d find the expected – the kind of establishments that matched the rowdy tales told in penny dreadfuls.

But in others, there was a touch of unexpected grandeur, with opulent parlors that offered a slice of luxury on the rugged frontier.

These workers, who were often younger than 30, with education as scarce as shade in the desert, played their part in the societal hierarchy.

Many couldn’t read or write, and a good number had journeyed from far-off lands, bringing with them stories as diverse as their backgrounds.

Their services’ prices weren’t just about looks; they were a complex mix of ethnicity and origin, reflecting the melting pot of the frontier and the harsh realities of its social structure.

Much like the faceless miners and railroad workers who toiled in anonymity, these individuals were cogs in the capitalist machine that drove the American dream forward.

Yet, despite their numbers and the role they played, they remained in the shadows, often ignored, their stories untold and their legacies uncelebrated in the grand narrative of the Old West.

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Wikimedia Commons

Homosexuality wasn’t a big deal.

Imagine the Old West, a place where the image of the stoic, rugged cowboy reigns supreme.

These icons of American folklore are often pictured as the epitome of traditional masculinity—rescuing those in peril, chewing tobacco, firing pistols, and never shying away from a stiff drink.

But hold your horses, because the real picture had more shades than a desert sunset.

It turns out, the cowboys of yore didn’t much fuss over one’s personal leanings, especially when it came to matters of the heart and desire.

Peter Boag, a history expert from the University of Colorado at Boulder and the author behind “Same Sex Affairs,” paints a picture of a society where the label of ‘homosexual’ just didn’t stick.

In the Wild West, folks were more inclined to go with the flow, expressing themselves in the moment without the rigid confines of modern labels.

In the all-male enclaves of mining camps, where the presence of women was as rare as a rainy day, men often stepped into roles and relationships that bucked the day’s gender expectations.

They found companionship, comfort, and even love in the arms of their fellow frontiersmen.

This slice of history shows us that the Old West was a place where the lines of gender roles and sexuality were as fluid as the rivers that carved the canyons, reminding us that the human experience has always been diverse and complex.

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Flickr

Taking birth control meant ingesting literal toxins.

Back in the days when the West was wild, the birds and the bees didn’t come with a handy instruction manual, and the stork seemed to visit less often than you’d expect.

Now, you might be scratching your head, wondering why the population wasn’t booming despite the, let’s say, free-spirited nature of the times.

Well, it wasn’t because the folks didn’t know how to dance the horizontal tango.

Condoms were around, sure, but they were as pricey as a good horse, putting them out of reach for most.

So, people got creative, often turning to what they called ‘medications’ to prevent or end pregnancies.

But here’s the kicker: these so-called medications were more like poisons, concocted from plants that were as likely to be found in a witch’s brew as in a doctor’s bag.

They were effective, alright, but they were dangerous, often causing miscarriages.

For the women of the night, the stakes were sky-high.

A baby bump could spell the end of their livelihood, not to mention the very real risks of dying in childbirth—a fate far too many women met on the frontier.

So, they stood at a crossroads: face the perilous prospects of motherhood or turn to treacherous tonics to avoid it.

It was a tough choice in tough times, a stark reminder of the harsh realities of life in the Old West.

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Wikimedia Commons

There was no privacy during the act.

Out in the untamed territories of the Wild West, the concept of ‘home sweet home’ often meant a cozy, one-room cabin where the whole family huddled together.

From sunup to sundown, parents, children, and sometimes even the odd uncle or cousin shared the same four walls.

This setup made sneaking in a moment of tenderness between ma and pa as tricky as threading a needle on horseback.

Now, if we take a gander across the pond to Europe, things were a bit different.

Back during the Reformation, a fellow by the name of Martin Luther was busy nailing his theses to the church door, and he also hammered home the idea that what happens between a husband and wife was sacred and private.

This notion of intimacy being a behind-closed-doors affair was a bit of a game-changer.

But back on the American frontier, your lot in life pretty much decided how much privacy you got.

If your pockets jingled with coin, you could afford a home with enough rooms to give love its own quarters.

But for most folks carving out a life in the Wild West, a private nook for romance was as rare as a diamond in a chicken coop.

So, for the average Joe and Jane, finding a sliver of solitude for a sweet embrace or a stolen kiss was a feat of creativity, often under the curious gaze of the rest of the clan.

It was a dance of discretion in a time and place where privacy was a luxury few could afford.

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Wikimedia Commons

Crossdressing was common among men and women during this time.

Historian Peter Boag has dug up some fascinating dirt from the Old West, and it’s not your usual gold nugget.

It turns out the frontier was quite the stage for a wardrobe switcheroo that would make even the boldest of today’s fashionistas tip their hats.

Women, it seems, were donning trousers and hats more often than we thought, not just for the sake of fashion, but for freedom.

By dressing as men, they could sidestep the gender hurdles of the day and grab hold of the opportunities that were, by default, reserved for the gents.

But here’s the kicker: it wasn’t just the ladies swapping skirts for slacks.

Boag stumbled upon a heap of tales about men who slipped into dresses and bonnets.

That’s right, in the land of cowboys and cattle drives, there were men who bucked the macho trend and explored a softer side of the wardrobe.

This two-way street of cross-dressing wasn’t just a fashion statement—it was a bold challenge to the rigid gender roles etched into the society of the time.

It’s a colorful thread in the fabric of the Old West, highlighting a history rich with individuals who weren’t afraid to blur the lines and bend the rules.

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There were some things even cowboys wouldn’t do.

Chad Heap takes us on a provocative stroll through history in his book “Slumming: Sexual and Racial Encounters in American Nightlife, 1885-1940,” where he peels back the curtain on the intimate mores of yesteryear.

It appears that back in the day, Americans had a rather reserved palette when it came to the bedroom menu, particularly regarding oral pleasure—a delight that was seen as quite the exotic dish and not part of the standard fare.

What’s more, even among the ladies of the night, there was a certain code of conduct.

Heap uncovers that these women, who were no strangers to the world of carnal pleasures, often shied away from this particular act.

And those who didn’t shy away?

Well, they found themselves on the receiving end of a cold shoulder from their peers.

This revelation offers a glimpse into the bedroom windows of the past, revealing a time when even the most liberal of love-making practices were bound by invisible lines of propriety and unspoken rules that governed even the most intimate of acts.

It’s a testament to the complex tapestry of sexual norms and stigmas that wove through the fabric of late 19th and early 20th-century America.

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Wikimedia Commons

Their vernacular was really different back then.

Back in the days when the West was still wild, folks had a whole other way of talking about the birds and the bees.

They didn’t use the words we’re familiar with today. Instead, they had their own colorful lingo, a vernacular as unique as their frontier lifestyle.

Take, for instance, the term “pirooting.”

Now, there’s a word that might cause a few raised eyebrows if you dropped it in polite company today.

But back then, it was their way of referring to the act of making love.

It’s a quirky reminder that the way we speak about intimacy has always been flavored by the times.

This special language of love and other nighttime activities paints a vivid picture of the Old West’s culture, where even the most universal of human experiences had its own local twang.

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Wikimedia Commons

Sexual assault and abuse was way too common.

In the rugged landscape of the Old West, women navigated a world where their choices were few and their status often relegated to a rung below their male counterparts.

This imbalance in power and respect brewed a harsh reality where sexual assault was a shadow that loomed large and menacing.

Survivors of such assaults found themselves in a society that offered little in the way of support or justice.

The avenues for redress were as barren as the deserts, leaving many to suffer in silence without the hope of vindication or protection.

Nancy Williams, an author and advocate for women in crisis, points out a sobering truth: while the world has leaped forward in technology, soaring from the chug of steam engines to the roar of jet engines and trading outhouses for the convenience of modern plumbing, the progress in safeguarding against sexual assault has not matched this trajectory.

Despite the passage of time and the advancements in so many areas of life, the fight against sexual violence remains a frontier yet to be fully conquered, a testament to the enduring struggle for safety and equality.

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Wikimedia Commons

There was a lack of education surrounding sex.

In the untamed days of the Old West, the birds and the bees were as much a mystery as the vast, uncharted territories.

Education on the more intimate aspects of life was as scarce as green grass during a drought, leaving folks with a patchy understanding of their own bodies, not to mention the risks of sexually transmitted infections (STIs) that lurked in the shadows.

Amidst this landscape of limited knowledge, there were attempts to shed light on the subject through what were known as “marriage manuals.”

These packets of wisdom were the go-to guides for the birds and the bees, but they were often riddled with inaccuracies and steeped in the moral codes of the time.

They preached a strict sermon: intimacy was meant for the marriage bed, and nowhere else.

These guides also echoed the era’s religious sentiments, casting self-pleasure in a grim light, as any venture of a man’s seed away from the path of procreation was frowned upon from the pulpit.

For the curious and the eager, the real lessons came through experience—the old trial and error method.

In a world without the benefit of formal education on such matters, and with resources thinner on the ground than a gambler’s promise, practical, hands-on learning was the order of the day for those looking to understand the intimate dance of human connection.

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