We all know kids have a way of saying things that can be unpredictable. Every one of us has seen a parent frantically try to shush their child in a public place. And many of us have been those parents. But sometimes, kids say something so insightful, so correct that you never forget it.
In these moments, kids remind us there are different and new ways of looking at the world. They also remind us that we might be better off if we tried to look at things like a child. I’m not saying you should ask your kids for help with your taxes (or quit your day job). I’m just saying there is a lot you can learn when you look at the world through the eyes of a child.
That’s why we’ve collected 75 instances where kids came up with genius names for common items. Some of them are funny and some will make you go “Huh?” While a lot of them might be weird, there are a few that should be added to the Merriam-Webster dictionary. We hope you enjoy these unfiltered insights from some brilliant kids. Don’t worry, no shushing’s required.
1. Party dogs
I’m not sure why wolves are specifically considered “party dogs” to this kid, but I’m willing to buy it. Who knows what those wolves are up to out in the forest?
Calling gloves “hand socks” makes perfect sense when you think about it. It’s not too far from the German word for gloves, “hand shoes.” This kid is innovative.
Don’t get the word librarier mixed up with librarian. A librarian is someone who keeps the library organized. A librarier is someone who reads books professionally.
Pasta pockets are a perfect description for ravioli, and I propose we all adopt this term immediately. Everyone would immediately understand what we were talking about.
Kids are famously amused by bodily functions, so it’s not surprising they come up with silly words for farts. Pants-singing is a pretty creative one, though.
Here’s yet another term that a child came up with to describe passing gas. On the bright side, at least she said, “Pardon me.” Her parents are raising her well.
As we said, kids are endlessly amused by farts and burps. This kid knows a little bit about digestion and understands that farts are kind of “food ghosts.”
Face grass is a surprisingly good descriptor for facial hair. I might just start referring to it by that term. “That hipster has some amazing face grass.”
Every kid gets to the point where they’re fascinated by death — even if it’s just a phase. They all start asking questions about people dying. Sometimes, they even add words.
It’s common for kids to start talking about certain phrases. But their parents can’t always figure out what they’re trying to say. As it turns out, “flamingo witches” was a fancy way of saying “vultures.”
This term for a cemetery isn’t quite as macabre. The kid thought they were parks that people filled with flowers. His parents let him continue believing that.
Technically, the term “boo-boo truck” is excellent for an ambulance. The term is relatively close to the word in some other languages, including German.
Most of the time when kids make up words, they’re hilarious. But now and then, the things they come up with are unexpectedly beautiful. This is one of those.
A rhinoceros sort of looks like a unicorn that’s put on some military gear and is ready for battle. Please let children name all the new animals from now on.
Calling wallets “money pockets” is pretty spot-on when it comes to descriptions. Unfortunately, part of adult life is learning how often they’re “no-money pockets.”
If you don’t know what a pangolin is, look it up right now. You’ll immediately see how accurate it is to describe them as “otter knights.” This kid knows what they’re talking about.
This kid’s description of a crow was so amazing that the official Merriam-Webster Twitter account was notified. I hope they took proper action right away.
Do you remember those terrible Kraft singles we all loved so much as kids? “Kraft singles” isn’t a very intuitive term. “Cheese pads” sounds much better.
We’ve all heard the trope of the cowboy who plays his harmonica around the campfire at night. It makes perfect sense to refer to it as a cowboy trumpet.
If you think about it, you do use a fly swatter to spank bugs. You’re just spanking their entire body very hard and fast until you squish them. The logic checks out.
Chicken has chicken bones, fish has fish bones, and pizza, obviously, has pizza bones. We won’t go into a conversation about where chicken and fish come from.
Squirrels are technically rodents, so it’s perfectly acceptable to refer to them as yard rats. Thankfully, most rats don’t have giant bushy tails — that would make them terrifying.
I’m not sure how this 3-year-old decided that a hummingbird should be called a butterfly dragon. All I know is I kind of love it. It’s an elegant descriptor.
I’m trying my hardest to delve into the thought process here. Are they friendship bagels because you split them in half and share them with a friend? Or are the two muffin halves friends?
This is a particularly adorable way of saying “elevator,” but it’s not that far off from the British English term. What’s the real difference between “uppy room” and “lift”?
When a drink is highly carbonated, that burn of the bubbles is similar to the feeling of something spicy on your tongue. If I’d never tasted carbonation before, I might think of it as spicy, too.
Technically, we already have a real word for “nexterday.” However, the word “tomorrow” isn’t nearly as interesting. There’s something adorable about saying: yesterday, today, nexterday.
You know this kid grew up in the city when he points to a rat and calls it a kitten. Hopefully, he’s not picking up any “train kittens” and trying to cuddle them.
We’ve heard all kinds of terms for cemeteries from the sweet and innocent to the macabre. This one, “gardens of dead people,” sounds like something straight out of a horror movie.
It makes sense when you think about it: this little boy was mixing up his adjectives and verbs. He was going fast when he ran, therefore, he was “fasting.” Get it?
The veterinarian clinic was the “puppy-hurt store” to this sweet kid because that was the place where puppies went when they got hurt. Something tells me any veterinarian would love their clinic to be known that way.
In the simplest terms, this is exactly what nettles are: plants that sting if you touch them. If you’ve ever fallen into a nettle bush, you’ll never forget it.
Young kids learning to talk might very well still remember breastfeeding. Or maybe they see younger siblings nursing. To them, that’s what breasts do — they feed babies.
Do you recall seeing smokestacks when you were a kid and being amazed by the plumes of “clouds” that emerged from them? Some kids think that’s where clouds are made.
Some kids make up terms so logical, they’re found in other languages. “Hand ankles” might not make sense in English, but the term is easy to understand all the same.
This little girl didn’t invent the word backhoe, but she came up with an interesting meaning for it. In her mind, it was a type of dinosaur. Wouldn’t that be a backhoeasaurus?
English might be a highly descriptive language, but we don’t have clear descriptors of our different toes. Sure, we call it a “big toe,” but that’s so boring. “Thumb toe” has a much better ring to it.
It might take you a moment to get it, but if you think hard, it does make sense. Kids become more knowledgeable by relating to other things. Faces have chins. Therefore feet do, too.
I’m guessing this one started as something that was misheard. Then it became an adorable habit. Trust me, if your kid says “baby bugs,” don’t ever correct them.
In the category of “inadvertently creepy children’s inventions” is the term “Dracula bin.” Using that term at a funeral is the best way to make all the adults immediately uncomfortable.
If the eagle is the king of the birds, I suppose it makes sense to describe all other birds in relative terms. Using that line of logic, flamingoes would be pink eagles, hummingbirds would be tiny eagles, and penguins would be ice eagles.
Look, correct him if you want, but this kid is totally on the ball. A ladle should be called a souper scooper and that’s what I’m going to call it from now on.
If you didn’t know you can cook eggs in the microwave, you’ve just learned an amazing life hack. Of course, if you want, you can refer to them as “bings.”
Did you immediately guess what a stinker cat was? Yup, it’s a skunk, which makes total sense. They look so cute and cuddly, just like a litter of adorable kittens.
Owls and penguins are only distantly related, but hey, whatever works for you. She’s on the money with the cold part — penguins are very cold at all times.
For one kid, it made sense to call a crowded parking lot “a parked car party.” Having been in one, I can confirm that’s nothing like a party and not fun at all.
I’m not sure why every kid who sees a hummingbird automatically assumes it’s a tiny dragon. But even though I don’t understand, I approve. I can even see their line of thinking.
Sure, Saran wrap is made of plastic, but I understand this kid’s line of logic. The good thing…it’s not sharp — I’d hate to see what a paper glass cut looks like.
If this phrase made you shudder, don’t be alarmed. They were just getting creative with a new name for soy sauce. In their defense, it is kind of like sushi juice.
What’s harder to explain: the phrase “hot dog whippers” or the fact that your kid knows what nunchucks are? In this case, I’m pretty sure the explanation goes hand-in-hand.
For some reason, the flamingoes’ resemblance to chickens is what stood out to this little girl. From my perspective, I would’ve called them “pink chickens,” but to each their own.
This story is hysterical. Not only because the little boy decided the store had ghost doors, but also because he was terrified of them. Is it mean to laugh?
This kid’s logic is amazingly sound. Armadillos are just squirrels wearing heavy armor to protect themselves during a battle. There’s a squirrel somewhere under those layers.
I don’t see the problem here. Pizza crusts are absolutely pizza handles. Where else will you hold your pizza, unless you want to get your fingers all greasy?
Yes, this one is self-explanatory and adorable. Technically, we don’t need a separate word for passing gas from the bottom. In that sense, they’re butt burps.
If you think about this one for a minute, you’ll get it and laugh. We’ve all experienced “fizzy feet” before — you know, the feeling of your feet falling asleep.
75 times kids came up with genius names for common items and they were spot on
Cedric Jackson
12.11.19
We all know kids have a way of saying things that can be unpredictable. Every one of us has seen a parent frantically try to shush their child in a public place. And many of us have been those parents. But sometimes, kids say something so insightful, so correct that you never forget it.
In these moments, kids remind us there are different and new ways of looking at the world. They also remind us that we might be better off if we tried to look at things like a child. I’m not saying you should ask your kids for help with your taxes (or quit your day job). I’m just saying there is a lot you can learn when you look at the world through the eyes of a child.
That’s why we’ve collected 75 instances where kids came up with genius names for common items. Some of them are funny and some will make you go “Huh?” While a lot of them might be weird, there are a few that should be added to the Merriam-Webster dictionary. We hope you enjoy these unfiltered insights from some brilliant kids. Don’t worry, no shushing’s required.
