Well, when you’re trapped in the car with nothing else to do, why not? It’s not like she’s going anywhere anytime soon.

@LittleGirlWithShortLegs:

“This is the kind of person I want to be. Just keep smiling through it all.”

This guy’s homage to Marilyn Monroe’s famous subway grate scene must be making her roll in her grave! But, he obviously doesn’t care, because she’s dead anyways, right?

@Marc:

“Anything Marilyn could do, I can do better! See?”

If you ever wondered why going to the DMV always takes so long, here’s your answer. This pretty much sums up government bureaucracy in a nutshell.

@Mari Louw:

“Well, at least she bothered to show up for work.”

I think this is why McDonald’s got rid of their “Supersize” menu. They just couldn’t compete with KFC’s gallon-sized Diabeetus Bucket™!

@Anonymous:

“That’s the new 512-ounce child size cup.”

Gramps must have been napping through the entire iPod generation. Either that, or he really misses lugging around those hefty “portable” boomboxes that can’t even play his favorite 8-track tapes!

@mondaywonderhands:

“The stereo is actually hollowed out so he can fill it with corn and fried chicken to take home.”

@anonymous:

“No joke. I work at a Sizzler. I’ve seen ploys trickier than this to steal salad.”

Live and learn, people, live and learn. This is how you drink green smoothies at the gym!

@Cat Meow:

“I aspire to be her when I’m old.”

@Zoe Krishel:

“I aspire to be her now!!!”

Even when the waves came crashing down on their friend, this group of ladies just kept on smiling! That’s okay though, ‘Nana should be able to hold her breath for just a little while longer.

@Cameron_Sosa:

“Grandma always told the craziest stories, “They’re stealing my pills…The orderlies are trying to kill me…My daughters tried to drown me…” Grandmas…”

Looks like Jesus isn’t the only superhero in town. But, who are we to judge that one kid who always shows up everywhere in a hero costume?

@nat_applicable:

“The wise men brought with them gifts of gold, myrrh, and spidercense.”

If you ever wondered what true love looks like, here you go! Only a couple who has been married for way too many years can truly understand the wacky no ducks given kind of relationship they have.

@Marc:

“I like the fact, that he’s carrying a whip. Not sure, if it’s for the horse, the wife, both, or other people, who don’t get out of their way fast enough.”

Better give this future mob boss a banana before you get a punch to the face. You don’t want that intimidating shadow to come back and haunt you!

@niamhmrn:

“Reminds me of the time my brother pretended to be lost, went to a random persons house and asked for sausages and chips because he was scared and sad. He did in fact receive said sausages and chips.”

Real engineers don’t need to care about how they look or dress. They’re busy re-inventing the world so we can have things like smartphones and teleportation.

@Jux_:

“The key is to be so good at your job that your bosses simply don’t care.”

@panzer89:

“It looks like he was told there was pizza in the conference room and right as they snapped the pic he figured out he was lied to.”

He doesn’t even care that there aren’t enough pancakes to go around. Why should he? Every last flapjack on that griddle is all his!

“Yeah, so what if there’s a hole in my shoe so big that my leg slid right on through? No time to fix it, not when I’m too busy doing important stuff, like standing around doing nuthin’.”

@SkidMark_walhberg:

“I once saw a grungy looking dude walking around outside wearing only one shoe. ‘What happened,’ I said, ‘you lose a shoe'” Him: ‘Nah, I found one.’

It’s just a Lady Godiva wannabe riding her painted horse and walking her pup on a sunny Florida afternoon. Jealous much?

@JokersUnited:

“Floridian here. The only thing weird about this picture is that the dog isn’t on a leash.”

This Russian Juliet looks like she’s impatient for her Romeo Romanov to arrive. But, he can’t miss her – she’s the only “zero f*cks given” dangling off of this depressing, post-Cold War balcony.

@lamenralus:

“What is in a name? A vodka by any other name would smell as sweet.”

The catch of the day can’t get any fresher than this. All you have to do is reach underneath the table and grab whatever is trying to swim away!

@Anonymous:

“Not gonna lie… I’ve always kinda wanted to paddle through a flooded city.”

@mems_account:

“Paddle? what are you a hippie? Jet ski that shit.”

This is so much easier than getting an Airbnb and having to go through security all over again. Just setup a fort near your gate and it’s only a hop, skip, and a jump away from the nearest Starbucks in the morning.

@SamuraiSevens:

“I’m surprised he didn’t have to check that. 3+ ounces of shampoo isn’t allowed, but tent posts are OK!”

This guy looks like he’s pretty strung out! But, when you don’t have a tent to pitch, you gotta get creative.

@StandardDeviant:

“As someone who used to play the bass, I have done this.”

@RainbowJuggler:

“I just had a great idea involving inconspicuous transport of dead bodies! Gotta go!”

Remember the good old days when you could ride in the back of a pickup truck and party like there was no tomorrow? Well this stylin’ chair king is taking “invincible AF” ethnic redneck to the next level!

Not even an arrow to the chest could wipe the smile off this proud dad’s face. The boy sitting next to him must have been the one to make that fabulous shot.

Maybe that’s because Australia is the “land of nope” that’s famous for harboring the most threatening animals on the planet! It’s also the home of Fosters beer…so yeah, they really don’t care.

@Strayed_the_3rd:

“That’s far too deep for Australia. Source: I’m Australian.”

She’s probably the same kind of grandma who still writes out a personal check at the grocery store. There’s line of followers no matter where she goes!

@Sergio Bicerra:

“Keep rolling meemah!”

@Heidi Smith:

“Look at her face! She’s like ha these bastards don’t know what their missing out on!”

There’s always one person in the bunch who just has to be that special snowflake. But, the person who follows the beat of their own drum is usually the one who is having the most fun!

Remember when you were a kid and begged your mom to let you ride in the shopping cart? Well, why does all the fun have to stop just because you’re 30 instead of 3?

The traffic warden who gave this state trooper a parking ticket is now everyone’s hero. Sometimes you just have to stick it to ’em when law enforcement thinks they’re above the law!

@JaneOfAllTrades82:

“I saw a cop car stopped at a red light turn on its lights to speed through the intersection, then turn them off again once past the light. He wouldn’t have had to wait long for the light to turn green, either.”

When that mid-morning slump hits and you don’t have a Snickers candy bar, there’s nothing wrong with taking a little nappy nap to recharge. At least he came well prepared for the boring college lecture!

This is one of those rare “People of Walmart” pictures that actually makes total sense. He’s just testing the chair out before he decides whether or not he wants to buy it.

There’s fire trucks, police cars, and flames everywhere. But, this kiddo doesn’t give a hoot about all the ruckus and just wants to swing.

@Marc:

“Why should I care for the world? Push harder!”

@John L:

“Now, if only that truck would move, so I can get a better view.”

Naughty grandpa gets it…just not at home. And it turns out all those wives tales about going blind are not true. It’s your neck that you have to worry about!

@Marcia J. Downing:

“Men! From the time they know what it is that’s ALLLLLL they ever think about!!!”

When you still have questions about what men really want in bed, it’s never too late to educate yourself. Who cares if someone’s watching you read a book about how to get the best and most mind-blowing sleep experience of your life?

@Johnny Døpe:

“Sleep!!! Men want to sleep!!!”

Garbage bags may not be everyone’s first choice for fashionable outerwear, but at least it covers up his indecent bits! Plus, it’s just the right price point for a starving college student.

@_Cambria:

“I live half a mile from University of Florida and have seen men run down university Blvd half naked carrying poodles and chihuahuas. After a while, shit like this no longer surprises you.”

Well, mom always knows best. She’s probably thinking, “Wonderful, that’s two less mouths to feed. And I have proof that it was totally an accident!”

@rojollo:

“My mom would have gotten the hose out.”

Nothing compares to the feeling of freezing wind and snow pelting your face! But, when you grow up in Wisconsin, a light blizzard like this almost feels like winter in Florida.

@obizues:

As a Wisconsinite I can confirm that our cold receptors are damaged at a very early age so we can no longer feel cold.

@tupactopus:

“They’re already driving a Miata, I don’t think they ever cared.”

Uh oh, now nana’s gone and done it! She just gave them a free pass to eat in her bed.

@estew4525:

“I work at a very busy bar in midtown Atlanta and things get pretty crazy. The other day I was walking with my owner and he stopped mid tracks and screamed “HEY! I DON’T DRINK IN YOUR BEDROOM, STOP F**KING IN MY BAR”

It turns out that even inanimate objects couldn’t care less if they float your boat. Let that sill one-liner sink in for a minute!

Now here’s a man who doesn’t give a crap about taking a dump and letting the world know about it. Given his elderly age, he may have even pooped right there in his pants!

@cyclicamp:

“When he takes the occasion to wear that shirt, he probably gets all sorts of high-fives from his peers down at the shuffleboard hall. ‘Hey, way to go, Bob. Tell us your secret!'”

@Uglybuddy:

“Master of self-defecating humor.”

Don’t let his old age fool you – this tough guy is rolling through the tightest part of this wolf pack like he owns it! Maybe that’s because this menace to society is a WWII vet who fled fascist Italy, was drafted into the US Army, has jumped out of planes, and has even defended the “land of nope” aka Australia.

@TheDancingRobot:

“Lived through the depression, wars, recessions, Bieber-fever and still chops his own goddamn wood for his industrial strength wood stove at 94 f**king years old.”

Mom ran out of ducks to give. But, it is a frozen ice cream cake, and those are a bitch to poke with candles!

@slopdog:

“No points for creativity. That scented candle coupled with the birthday cake probably smells awful.”

@reubensammies:

“When all the fucks go out the window, creativity tends to follow.”

Forget getting your pizza delivered! Just pick it up in person and then exercise it on the way home. That way, it won’t have as many calories when you finally eat it. It’s bro science!

@Ice-berg:

“They see him rollin’, they hatin!”

When you’re in a rush to catch your flight but grumpy granny pulls a Gandalf the Gray from Lord of the Rings and body blocks you. “You shall not pass!”

@privs:

“That’s when you be an [bleep] and plow right through her feeble old arm.”

@skawomplious:

“Excuse me, ma’am, while I move you out of the way.”

This is probably why we were taught not to color outside the lines as a kid. But in some countries, total anarchy rules!

@the_supersalad:

“They are so politely anarchistic… It’s like se sort of Canadian parking rebellion.”

Flood, what flood? It’s just a puddle. There’s plenty of time to get in a few beers before the water rises up to their knees.

If you remember what school cafeteria food tastes like, then you really can’t blame him. He’s just one of those rare kids that give any ducks about what other people think!

Go on, admit it. You’re just jealous that she has a table that’s big enough to curl up on during her lunch break!

@Stevie Elsdon:

“I slept under one of my work desks, I pulled the chair in and no one noticed.”

Geez, seniors these days are so addicted to technology that they don’t pay attention to their surroundings. All they care about is Pokemon Go and tweeting!

@creepy_is_what_I_do:

“I read that as “porn pictures” and thought ‘Just like my grandpa in the 70s!'”

This image is so unsettling. What’s up with Best Buy not providing bean bags so you can sit comfortably while you demo freeload on games all day?

@addledson:

“I was a Home Essentials Sup for awhile. I used to gather up all the remotes for the little tv’s attached to the consoles, and fuck with anyone that played more than 20-30 mins or at closing time. If you hide behind a rack and repeatedly turn the TV off (especially at critical moments in Guitar Hero renditions of Paradise City) and back on, the little shit will usually give up and move on.”

Guess someone couldn’t be bothered to change the time. But, the good news is that this clock is correct at least 4 months out of the year when Daylight Saving Time ends.

@Hamlets twin:

“Short people problems.”

To be fair, the former CEO of Hewlett-Packard was interrupting the woman’s breakfast, and not the other way around. She has a right to eat her omelet in peace without being surrounded by all that BS.

Well, why not? While everyone else has their eyes on the ball, she’s got her eyes on the sticks.

@Warlizard:

“I thought those were cactus. When you live in Arizona, everything looks like a cactus. Zoomed in — NOT cactus.”

Like chocolate and booze, family is best taken in small doses. Just let her finish listening to Jeopardy and she’ll com around.

This is actually a pretty genius move on dad’s part. He can still return it to Walmart after winter is over!

@FLMedic:

“10 years from now on Craigslist: NIB Thermometer”

@Zurotai:

“Maybe he wants to return it later or doesn’t want to risk slicing an artery just to open that clamshell packaging. Win-win all around!”

Hey, as long as it comes with free refills, she’s set for the whole week. Otherwise that $40 gallon of milk is going to eat into her student meal plan long before the semester is over.

@VisciousPuddin:

“I used to take pizza home in a ziplock bag… for what they charged for a meal plan I didn’t feel guilty. I was however a big pussy about it, you would think I was stealing the declaration of independence with Nicholas Cage. THEY’RE ALWAYS WATCHING.”

Well, she is actually covered up more than most people. Plus, it’s good to know that Redbox will always be there for you when you roll out of bed first thing in the morning and aren’t subscribed to any streaming video services.

@shlomo_francis:

“Hey it’s redbox…the Wal-Mart of movie rentals….no shirt no shoes….f*ck it”

@Delta_Foxtrot:

“One word to save your dignity, people: Netflix.”

Unlike most celebrities out there, he’s just very comfortable in his own skin. Knowing him, he probably planned this mismatched mess of an outfit on purpose!

@TradocTanker:

“I actually met him last week. They held a screening for “Fury” on Fort Benning and the cast and director showed up. He came up to my group, shook everyone’s hand, knew our ranks so he addressed us by that, and when we asked if we could get a picture he said “yeah, f*ck yeah let’s do it!” And gave us a great photo. He also had a badass beard going on.”

The exasperated woman sitting next to him is so over it! But, you have to admit, given all the hardcore freebies you can access online, old school magazines like Playboy are actually rather tame.

@dellort:

“The redhead in the back casually reading over his shoulder…+1”

@kingdownvoter:

“It’s all fun and games till you glance at the crotchal region”

Whatever you do, just don’t order the footlong with mayonnaise. In fact, it might actually be best to the advice from the sign posted in the window and just “pass” on this.

@Suivoh:

“Worst part was… I went in without shoes and he refused me service!”

These kids made the local paper for underage drinking. Can you guess which one of these beauties was most likely the ringleader?

Nothing wrong with giving the house a little bit of extra insulation that mother nature so graciously provided free of charge. I mean, think about what igloos are made of! You don’t see Eskimos crying about a little bit of powder on the outside of their home!

It turns out that mustard is actually good for things like cramps and heartburn. But dang, why does this lady have to suck on the bottle like a baby at her mama’s nipple?

@NarwhalBaconBites:

“If I had to bet, there is no mustard in that bottle. My money is on vodka.”

@BoredRedhead:

“Absolut Dijon”

This guy is most likely a long-haul trucker, and this is actually pretty ingenious. Do you know how many cups of coffee these guys go through in a single day of driving?

Even though the floor is hot lava for real, this photographer isn’t going to let a little bit of extra heat ruin the perfect shot. There’s still plenty of time left before the flames start singeing all the little hairs in his nose!

All that for a tiny square of greasy microwave pizza? Wow, he really doesn’t give any ducks!

@dnbeyer:

“Back in my day, kids brought peanut butter sandwiches to school and we liked it that way.”

@dnlslm9:

“You think girls would be swarming him to warm up their buns.”

This senior is kind of like those annoying motorcyclists who swerve in-between cars. Except, his ride is moving at a much slower pace, and he’s staying the course by following the big white line.

@BlackMissionGoggles:

“That’s so adorable! RIP.”

@ChargerMatt:

“If it looks stupid but it works it ain’t stupid.”

Oh how adorable is this, it’s a conga line for seniors and limited mobility folks! But, how in the world did the white-haired granny up front manage to get pole position?

@He4rtless:

“The human scooterpede.”

@MHfromNH:

“As someone who works retail: those things are SO FUN. We’ve had drag races with those things when we’re closed.”

He’s probably the son or nephew of the bus driver. This passive form is babysitting must be working, because there’s no screaming kid running up and down the aisles!

Guess the driver wasn’t falling for this friendly note to just knock on the door. After all, you never know who could be on the other side It could be someone as dangerous as Mr. and Mrs. Currier waiting for their package!

@mi_nombre_es_ricardo:

“I once was sitting by the door when I heard foot steps outside. When I opened the door there was the Fedex guy walking towards his truck, and the stupid note was left at my door. I yelled him and said: “Hey, weren’t you gonna knock?!” and he was like Oh yeah, I was just about to (he was actually about to jump into his truck).”

Once you’ve paid your dues in life and are going to die any day now, it’s time to have some fun. Don’t get all jelly because seniors get away with doing stuff like this!

@albinoblksheep:

“Is it okay to call senile old people [bleep]s for taking up two parking spaces?”

@TubbzMcgee:

“If I ever get old I’m totally doing [bleep] like this.”

Nothing wrong with pairing a sombrero with a ripped dress shirt that shows off some side boob. The only thing missing here is a bottle of cheap tequila and a yappy pocket Chihuahua.

@Maria Dickerson Pinel:

“Check out the pink sunglasses in his shirt pocket!”

When you’re on a Segway, you may as well make it awesome and get it all playa-ed out. People are gonna stare at you anyways just because it’s a Segway, and well, you’re also wearing purple pants. Nothing but the best for the queens of San Francisco!

@Elizabott:

“I DO see you rollin’, sir. Respect.”

Well, at least this Sikh is being very polite about his reading habits. He’s crossing his legs so no one has to unsee anything that might accidentally stick out in public.

@Gerry Higgins:

“No one ever said a sikh can’t enjoy the beauty of women.”

There’s nothing wrong with enjoying a little bit of America’s “seedier” side. That’s just one of the perks of being called your “highness.”

@spyd3rweb:

“Laurence Kushburne”

@ramdaskm:

“Sweed….!”

@Vio_:

“They’re not called the High Atlas Mountains for nothing.”

Let’s be real here. Sometimes it can feel like you spend half your life commuting, so whats wrong with getting comfy and making it count for something?

@Bear_Manly:

“That lady on the right is trying so hard not to look.”

@TeTrodoToxin4:

“She did put her purse in between to serve as a barrier to defend herself.”

There’s no sandwich or tin of tuna in sight. And that big black spoon just proves that this lady gives zero ducks!

@jimmyayo:

“She gave up a long time ago.”

@toastr:

“Yes, yes she did. Much like my mother-in-law who I once caught eating a stick of butter.”

@Wilhelm_Amenbreak:

“I am giving her the benefit of the doubt. She was being thrifty and eating her lunch which was chicken salad that she had put in a mayo jar. Because f*ck Tupperware!”

He’s just blowing up his date at the gas station so he doesn’t get too lonely on the way home from work. This dude’s got priorities, ya’ll!

Obviously the 5-second rule doesn’t apply here. That’s because this kiddo’s hygiene habits has gone way past giving any ducks!