Kidsโ drawings are usually pretty cute. Their little minds are just starting to understand the world and their hands โ well, their hands arenโt really all that developed yet. All this is to say that sometimes, their drawings are just plain bad.
And thatโs okay. Even if the drawings are bad, thereโs no doubt their parents will love them regardless. After all, itโs the thought that counts, right? And thereโs nothing that counts more than the thoughts of your little boy or girl.
Of course, kids are also completely innocent. They donโt know a lot about the world yet, and what they do know is pretty sweet, clean, and safe. But what that means is that sometimes, they draw some really messed-up stuff.
Often, theyโre trying to capture a situation they witnessed but donโt quite understand yet. Sometimes, theyโre showing that they understand just a little bit more than most kids their age. And of course, there are occasions when theyโre just drawing things that inadvertently look like genitalia.
Thereโs no doubt that every single one of these drawings deserves to be cherished. And years later their parents can pull them out and laugh all over again! Only next time, the kids will actually understand the joke.
Thereโs nothing wrong with enjoying a glass of wine, but when your kid draws a picture of it for school showing you having some, itโs a little awkward. It kind of implies thatโs the main facet of your personality.
Thank goodness that Antonia labeled her work so clearly. Now we know it depicts a pair of scissors and not a giant phallic shape. Maybe we wonโt draw scissors anymore.
12. Sounds like a typical sibling relationship to me!
This picture, a relic from the posterโs childhood, depicts her sister sacrificing her to an alien. We all have complicated relationships with our siblings growing up although this might be in a league of its own.
This embarrassed mom had to explain to the teacher that her daughterโs photo was not her dancing around a pole, but rather selling the last snow shovel at Home Depot during a bad winter storm. I donโt think the little girl will ever live that down!
Most of us donโt really understand why the Kardashians are famous, but depicting them being smashed by the Incredible Hulk โ well, thatโs a little dark, especially for a child. The kid threw a couple of zingers in there about their looks and love lives, too.
I donโt think thereโs a worse way to misspell Buzz Lightyearโs catchphrase โI come in peace.โ This kid found the very worst one, and yes, weโre all uncomfortable.
Yes, everybody does it, but do we really have to include it in family portraits? Apparently, for this child, gassiness is an important part of her motherโs life.
Some of us can probably relate to having a babysitter we didnโt like very much during childhood. But most of us didnโt leave a threatening note depicting them being beheaded with an ax.
Thereโs nothing wrong with this drawing, depicting a fun day by the ocean. Unfortunately, this child made a pretty awkward spelling error. But hey, they spelled THAT word perfectly!
Technically, it doesnโt say where the first day is taking place. Maybe it wasnโt in a school at all. Perhaps it was in a nudist colony. Or it could be a plastic surgeon who does breast augmentations.
A home chalkboard might not have been the best idea for this household where a brother enjoys tormenting his younger sister. I get the feeling that Emma might be a redheadโฆ
One little girl drew this rather frightening image of her father after they had a fight. Apparently, she planned on killing him with a broad smile on her face. Time for therapy!
Thereโs nothing like reminding your dear grandmother that the Grim Reaper is on his way to take her out of this life. Well, technically they didnโt say anything about the Grim Reaper, but they sure spent some time on that gravestone.
This picture was probably done around Halloween and the teacher had all the kids draw skeletons. Unfortunately, this student put just a little too much detail into his. In spite of some slang terms, thereโs no bone down there.
This child gave their mother a beautiful Motherโs Day card. It included what was supposed to be an enthusiastic double thumbs-up. Unfortunately, it looks like a cheerful double flipping of the bird.
With any luck, this picture was drawn and captioned by a child with a tongue-in-cheek sense of humor. Their parents will be telling the story of how this image freaked their childโs teacher out for the rest of their lives.
Children often come up with some pretty wild misspellings when theyโre first learning how to write. This fantastically bad one is about as wrong as you can. In fact, I donโt know what they could possibly have meant.
Can you imagine being so gassy that your child includes it in your family portrait? One day theyโll be saying, โMy mom loved me unconditionally, and my dad farted a lot.โ
Most people would probably say if dinosaurs came back, we would put them in a park (a Jurassic one, maybe!). But this little girl had a somehow even more barbaric idea that involved velociraptor-skin couches.
This poor kid hasnโt quite gotten the hang of drawing raindrops yet. In fact, if it wasnโt for the caption, I wouldnโt know that these were supposed to raindrops and notโฆsomething else
This child drew their parent, who said they werenโt sure whether they were being depicted as a phallic image or as something involving poop. If youโve ever spoken to a kindergartner, you know either is a possibility.
You know what the weirdest thing about this is? She wrote โwhen my mom diesโ and not โif she dies.โ What exactly are you planning, oh creepy child?
Hereโs another child who hasnโt gotten spelling down yet. Supposedly, this picture shows her mother smelling her stinky feet and saying, โYuck, P.U.!โ But, thatโs not what it says.
Remember learning the alphabet in school and doing those โA is for Appleโ books? This child decided they would pay tribute to the letter T with a picture of some tits โ I mean, tights.
I see what sheโs going for here, but I canโt help but think that a giant picture of Hitler isnโt the best idea. However, it does make me happy to know that Hitler is above a picture of ethnically-diverse people living happily together. Take that, racism!
โBreaking Badโ was an overnight hit when it came out. Some people have rated it as one of the best television shows of our time. I donโt remember a character named Mrs. Edwards, though.
โWhy am I laughing? Iโm not laughing at your picture, Jimmy. Itโs a great picture. Itโs so nice that your daddy likes to cook with you. Cook. C-O-O-K.โ
Iโm not sure whatโs going on in this picture, but I know what it looks like. It resembles three friends playing in the sunshine, one of whom isnโt wearing any clothes and needs a wax.
Some kids have a hard time distinguishing between Rs and Ls, as this little girl seems to. Sheโs displaying her sign with so much pride, unaware of what it really says!
In fairness, those two cats are pretty different. The top one is vaguely cat-like, while the bottom one bears no resemblance to anything remotely feline.
Now, you and I both know thatโs intended to be a hose used to spray water on a fire. But there is just no getting around the fact that it looks pretty darn anatomical. The spraying is the worst part.
Yup, those definitely look like apples. At least, in the universe where apples resemble phallic alien shapes with misshapen testicles โ I mean, fruit.
The black horse in the back is supposed to be rearing, okay? REARING. Itโs not, as some filthy minds might assume, performing a sex act on the horse in the front. Although that could very well be something you see at the zoo.
This child clearly has some unspoken beef with his father, whoโs apparently in hell. Or you know, maybe he just went on a vacation to Florida in July? Iโm going to go with that explanation.
This is one of the few instances in which an inappropriate drawing isnโt helped by the caption โ in fact, that caption makes it much, much worse. For your information, itโs supposed to be a person shooing a fly away (i.e. whacking it off something).
Iโm really hoping this child has an explanation for this drawing and that it doesnโt involve their mom trying to hit their dad with a car. The shocked expression on Dadโs face doesnโt help.
38. So, I guess youโre not a fan of St. Patrickโs Day
Okay, to be fair, if youโve ever heard a traditional Irish fairy tale that involves leprechauns, this kind of makes sense. Those leprechauns usually try to steal someoneโs soul. At that point, itโs just self-defense.
You can always one-up someone in the โI love you moreโ game if they die. Or if you say โI love you times infinity and one.โ Those are both automatic wins. This child preferred the first method.
Okay, some of these are funny, but this one is truly disturbing. Whatโs up with these smiling, happy people who have gone on a murder spree in the coffee shop? Was this drawn by a young Ted Bundy?
Yes, yes, we all know itโs supposed to say โI love Santa.โ But you know her parents insisted on taking a picture just to embarrass her for the rest of her life. I would have made it our Christmas card.
Microphones arenโt the easiest thing to draw. But hereโs something to feel good about โ youโd probably be able to draw a better one than this one, which looks undeniably like an adult toy.
Have you ever seen a lawnmower that looks like this? Neither have I. This lady looks just a little too happy to be doing her yard work, if you know what I mean.
These are obviously eyeglasses and not a large pair of breasts. This is exactly what a pair of glasses looks like! Nope, this is definitely a pair of breasts.
Apparently, itโs all too easy to make an accidental phallic shape on a drawing. Who knew? This kid was trying to draw some finger guns, but unfortunately, the result isnโt quite what they were hoping for.
This one comes with a helpful back story. This drawing is of polar bears fighting in the Arctic โ not a depiction of their mating season! Get your mind out of the gutter!
Super Dad says, โScrew the haters,โ apparently. Nope, thatโs just a thumbs up heโs giving. It just looks like a different finger altogether. Hands are hard to draw!
Iโm going to make what I hope is an educated guess and say this is a giraffe with speckles. Because the alternative is that itโs an extremely detailed piece of male anatomy, and I just canโt live with that reality.
This lovely Fatherโs Day booklet depicts a person blowing on a whistle to call the train. Iโm sure Dad had a good laugh when he looked at that whistle and thoughtโฆwell, exactly what youโre thinking.
These children are testing the limits of all the things they can accidentally make look like a manโs private parts. In this newest contribution, no, thatโs not a guy doing what you think heโs doing, itโs a guy taking a selfie with a camera.
51. I *think* thatโs a monkey sucking its own tail
I donโt know why this monkey is sucking its own tail, but Iโm happy to accept it. The alternative is that itโs sucking something else, and to quote Michael Scott: โNope, donโt like that.โ
I think the worst part of this is that its head is pink. Aside from the general shape, itโs the pink head and almost invisible legs that make you do a double-take when you look at this giraffe.
Every mother treasures the pictures her children draw for her. Well, maybe not this one, especially since we canโt tell what the heck it is. But we sure know what it looks like.
In a change of pace from all the phallic shapes in childrenโs art, here are some butterflies that are surprisinglyโฆfeminine. Oh yeah, and those mushrooms definitely look like male anatomy.
Some kids think about getting married and having families of their own long before theyโe old enough to start thinking about romance. Not this kid, whoโs declared themselves for the single life at a young age.
When the child who drew this beautiful picture showed it to her mother, her mom replied, โWow, you gave us some big breasts!โ The little girl responded with a puzzled look: โThose arenโt breasts. Youโre praying!โ
57. These ladies are quite happy to visit the lighthouse
Add to the list of Things That Kids Have Made Look Phallic: lawnmowers, thumbs up, monkey tails, mushrooms, rubber ducks, flowers, trees, and now, of course, lighthouses. Apparently, itโs a shape found more often in nature than youโd think.
Children are known for their unique ability to say the most gut-wrenching and honest things in the sweetest possible way. But this ad is just brutal. Why, child? Why did you have to include that?
Think youโve met a disturbing kid? I see you that one and raise you the child who drew this, a My Little Pony that was brutally murdered. Not sure what that shape is in the corner, though. Iโm going to guess itโs a spider.
Hereโs another one that probably earned a call from the teacher and a very embarrassed explanation from the mother. No, Mrs. Johnson, I only drink a couple of glasses a week. I donโt know what Sally was talking about.
Iโm not sure whether this is a pair of happy pizza people or individuals with horrible cystic acne. Either way, itโs a little bit unsettling to look at. That might be a photo that โaccidentallyโ falls into the trash can.
Iโm not even sure how to unpack this one. The instructions say โDraw a picture of yourself,โ and this childโs response was to draw a bloody surgery with a small child screaming in the corner.
This familyโs pleasant day at the beach was interrupted by a piranha attack. Donโt you hate it when that happens? Even more terrifying, the piranhas can now climb up out of the water, too!
Apparently, this childโs school drawing (labeled โShake Shakeโ for reasons weโll never know) has lived on in infamy and is still framed in the teachersโ lounge, where every year, new faculty wonders what the heck is going on.
This kid is a realist. The average life expectancy for an American these days is 78.7 years, which means that most of us wonโt get to see our 100th birthday. The top picture is what he drew after his teacher made him redo it.
This child invented a character named Dave and promptly killed him. He then provided this detailed rendering of his lifeless body. Not sure who Dave is or why thereโs a vendetta against him, but he should watch his back.
A parent says their child gave them this drawing one day with no commentary. They still have no idea what the story behind this bizarre picture is. At this point, I donโt think Iโd want to know.
Ah, Mom. We love our moms with their bright pink pants, midriff-baring shirts, welcoming arms, and phallic feet. Oh, wait, your mom isnโt like this? Must just be me.
Isโฆis this supposed to be a duck? Is it yet another poorly-rendered giraffe? Is it the male anatomy with a horrible disease? The world will never know, and weโre not sure we want to.
Makayla loves her mom! In fact, she loves her so much she drew her these beautiful hearts. Theyโre definitely hearts and not any part of the body, such as a butt or a crotch.
Iโm not sure who this picture is supposed to be, but Iโm extremely confused by the emphasis on the breasts. I guess this precocious artist wanted to make sure we knew these were boobs, but didnโt know how to show them after the body was colored in?
I have a lot of questions about this picture. Why does no one have any arms? Whyโs there a yellow giant in the background? Is that purple thing what I think it is? Whatโs up with the Alcoholics Anonymous symbol above her head?
When Frozen came out in the early 2010s, it was an instant hit. Kids everywhere loved Queen Elsa, with her ice powers, amazing singing voice, and awesome dress. But Elsa, according to this artist, is pretty judgemental about her fashion choices.
I mean, I get it: these days we have everyone from Bill Nye to Zooey Deschanel telling us the planet is going to die if we donโt change our ways. But depicting the planet getting eaten by a giant tadpole monster is a little extreme.
This cat appears to have been dismembered and decapitated on a barbed-wire fence. If thatโs indeed what it is, Iโm going to disagree with the caption: it absolutely could not have been worse.
Kidsโ drawings are usually pretty cute. Their little minds are just starting to understand the world and their hands โ well, their hands arenโt really all that developed yet. All this is to say that sometimes, their drawings are just plain bad.
And thatโs okay. Even if the drawings are bad, thereโs no doubt their parents will love them regardless. After all, itโs the thought that counts, right? And thereโs nothing that counts more than the thoughts of your little boy or girl.
Of course, kids are also completely innocent. They donโt know a lot about the world yet, and what they do know is pretty sweet, clean, and safe. But what that means is that sometimes, they draw some really messed-up stuff.
Often, theyโre trying to capture a situation they witnessed but donโt quite understand yet. Sometimes, theyโre showing that they understand just a little bit more than most kids their age. And of course, there are occasions when theyโre just drawing things that inadvertently look like genitalia.
Thereโs no doubt that every single one of these drawings deserves to be cherished. And years later their parents can pull them out and laugh all over again! Only next time, the kids will actually understand the joke.