Dads, with their years of experience, can definitely share so many nuggets of wisdom or just utter witty responses if ever you speak to them about some problems or situations needing their advice. There can be those which some refer to as โDad sayingโ among the family members.
Dads may share advice that is something to treasure and they impaoirt life lessons that you will not forget for the rest of your life. Some advice, on the other hand, sounds weird or is pretty hilarious, making you just giggle or end up confused.
Whatever it is, practical fatherly advice can warn, educate, or remind you of things that you will remember as you grow older into adulthood. On the other hand, silly pieces of advice are memorable which you and your siblings can laugh about as you reminisce.
Here are 73 pieces of โdadviceโ that you will treasure. Not every one of them may be useful or sensible, but without a doubt, they are unforgettable.
1. If youโre going to hit someone, that is
Sometimes, you think your dadโs going to get mad but he surprises you by taking everything in stride. Not only did this dad react calmly, but he also gave some practical advice.
Source:
Twitter/@stellar8board
2. What a snob
Weโll never know the reasoning behind this fatherโs strange hatred of apples. Apparently, theyโre the fruit of the common rabble and he considers himself above all that.
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Twitter/@michigansoul
3. Heโs not pulling any punches
Scaremongering isnโt always the best way to get through to kids, but you canโt deny this leaves an impression. Seriously, people โ just buckle your seatbelt.
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Twitter/@tpatt356
4. I mean, he has a point
Well, thatโs not technically what that means, and I donโt know if the cruise line would accept it. But realistically, who else is going to be coming to help you out at sea? Dad is thinking practically.
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Twitter/@Mouchit91
5. A little too colorful, but itโs solid
Itโs just like a dad to compare love to bodily functions. But, like most fatherly advice, even though itโs disgusting, thereโs also got an element of truth to it.
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Twitter/@HannaPeters5
6. How to make money: by Dad
Some people just have โThat Face,โ the one that makes people tell them about their problems. Dadโs all about taking opportunities that present themselves. And we canโt exactly blame him.
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Twitter/@KattFunny
7. Seems a bit extreme
Dads can be naturally overprotective of their children, especially as they reach the dating age. But punching at a middle school dance might cause a scene.
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Twitter/@erichorvath
8. Well, there go my dreams of holding theater curtains down
Every dad has a saying heard by their kids a million times while growing up, but it still never made sense. This is one of those. The meaning is clear, butโฆa sandbag?
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Twitter/@lizdobson
9. Apparently, he thinks youโre dumb
Starting a new job can be nerve-wracking. Luckily, Dad supplied a vote of confidence. Or rather, he made his child doubt their intelligence for the rest of their life.
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Twitter/@laurentCoreFit
10. He makes a point well
Dads have a unique ability to make serious points but in a way thatโs funny. This advice is extremely important โ and he gave it in such a way that his child will never forget.
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Twitter/@mikeruss39
11. Hurtful, but helpful
Iโm guessing Dad didnโt intend to be rude โ that is, he wasnโt trying to imply she was fat. He was just trying to tell his daughter what her priorities should be.
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Twitter/@lilhanavas
12. Reverse psychology, I guess
Our parents raised us to think that random strangers would offer us drugs in dark alleyways. The reality is no one does that because, as he says, drugs are expensive.
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Twitter/@paigeleilani
13. Sounds safe
In driversโ ed, they teach you about defensive driving. But what they donโt teach you is โcreativeโ driving. Oh, wait, yes, they do โ in the lesson about accidents and speeding offenses.
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Twitter/@themasterwaifu
14. Okay, thatโs genius
If youโve ever been to college, you know there are two things universal for students: theyโre always hungry and rarely have money. In college, you take whatever free food you can find.
15. Making chores easier
Is this why dads seem to love mowing their lawn as often as possible? Are they just fantasizing about taking off a little bit around the edges?
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Twitter/@WalrusComedy
16. OhโฆOH
I donโt know how to start unpacking this one. Frankly, I have a few questions about how this advice was born. What prompted this pearl of wisdom โ or do I even want to know?
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Twitter/@andrewzimmern
17. Thanks, Iโm uncomfortable
Dads have a way of giving important life lessons in the weirdest and most awkward ways possible. I wonโt deny these lessons are true, but I also donโt want to think about them too much.
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Twitter/@JCampbellPhD
18. He wasnโt a sports fan
Some kids arenโt naturally inclined to sports. Regardless, parents should support them. It seems sports ability wasnโt important to Jimmy Fallonโs dad. He just wanted to go home.
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Twitter/@jimmyfallon
19. Thatโs a terrible idea
Older people often have an odd fixation of having their privacy violated. Theyโre very protective of their rights. But not using your turn signal is taking it way too far.
Source:
Twitter/@lesly_les_
20. He has his priorities straight
Either this dad was hoping to make his daughter smart by osmosis, thereby saving on college expenses, or he was hoping sheโd marry a rich guy. Either way, you canโt fault him for thinking outside of the box.
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Twitter/@JessicaMeier3
21. Anti-smoking PSA
In general, itโs a good idea to avoid smoking โ even though not everyone who smokes gets cancer. But this dadโs ideas of responsible consumption might be a little bit off-base.
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Twitter/@migsorona
22. Is that the best solution?
I feel like a good middle ground here would be to eat in moderation or wear sweatpants, but that wasnโt good enough for Dad. This begs the question: exactly how much was he eating?
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Twitter/@northrange1
23. Prioritize dental hygiene, kids
This was spoken by a dad who didnโt brush his teeth often enough and had to pay for an absurd amount of dental care. At least, thatโs what Iโm assuming. You donโt forget those harsh life lessons.
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Twitter/@Livin4Fuzypants
24. โฆor sweep you out to sea
Okay, this is funny to laugh at from afar. But in all seriousness, this is an excellent way to get yourself killed. A riptide isnโt the best way to test your swimming strength.
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Twitter/@bucsfanfitz
25. Be safe out there
I want to know if he gave any other context to this advice. Iโm assuming his warning of โnot to be the drunkestโ was to save some embarrassment. Alas, weโll never know the whole story.
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Twitter/@michigansoul
26. The times they are a-changinโ
When we were young, our fathers told us to speak to our mothers with respect. But with the changing of technology, the advice from our parents has to change, too. One day weโll be saying, โDonโt make fun of your mom on the holograph.โ
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Twitter/@kj_kindle
27. You canโt take it with you
Sure, itโs important to start a savings account. But ultimately, your money has to go somewhere. After all, you wonโt be taking it with you at the end of your life.
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Twitter/@keykatiek
28. Raising the stakes, there
This piece of advice is pretty extreme. Itโs definitely on a level above โHeโll put coal in your stocking.โ New theory: Santa gets the coal from the houses he burns down.
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Twitter/@KristenRose124
29. I feel like thatโs backward
You should never swerve to avoid hitting an animal โ at least not a small one, like a squirrel. But I get the feeling Dad got himself mixed up between trees and people.
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Twitter/@sha210
30. Itโs true, though
Babyproofing is a never-ending task, and some kids seem determined to find every tiny object in the house. Where did they find that little screw? Youโll never know.
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Twitter/@AriVoukydis
31. A good life lesson
A better lesson might be to avoid going around naked under a bathrobe, but weโll give it to him. It could save you a lot of future embarrassment โ and it seems as though Dad is speaking from experience.
Source:
Twitter/@MusicByPedro
32. It checks out
This is yet another one of those pieces of advice that mustโve come from real-world experience. I feel as though it shouldnโt need to be said, but thatโs where we are.
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Twitter/@BeanDeebe
33. Unless youโre a dog, of course
Do people drive with their heads out the car window? Well, this womanโs father does. It seems like a good way to get bugs and gravel on your face
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Twitter/@ALCooLJ
34. Sister doesnโt appreciate
Siblings fight about the strangest things, including flatulence. But parents donโt usually encourage them to blame their farts on one another. How about just saying โExcuse me?โ
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Twitter/@CGrothaus
35. That seems extreme
The way Dad worded this advice makes me think he was tired of listening to his kidsโ complain. Heโd rather they commit murder than subject him to those annoying people by proxy.
Source:
Twitter/@ki_a_lily
36. Thatโs certainly one solution
Some dads tell their kids to forget their cheating ex and get revenge by being happy. Not this dad. He had more extreme โ and weird โ advice.
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Twitter/@LeaPeea
37. He has specific expectations for chicken
Something tells me this father-in-law had a bad experience with expensive chicken. Either that or heโs a cheapskate and takes unregulated chicken prices very personally.
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Twitter/@BNortontriopm
38. Iโm guessing he didnโt go to medical school
Plenty of dads have some version of this, maybe โrub some dirt on itโ or โwalk it off.โ Itโs all the same way of saying: โYouโre going to get over it because I donโt want to take you to the hospital.โ
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Twitter/@Leaaurenzi
39. Good to remember
Beer does tend to go through your system much faster than most alcohol. But Iโm not sure what Dadโs trying to say here โ maybe โGo to the bathroom before you get in the carโ?
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Twitter/@Its_Rachel
40. Stop victory dancing, Dad
The biggest problem with this โsolutionโ โ besides the fact that it doesnโt satisfy thirst โ is that you produce less saliva as you get more dehydrated. Dad needs to read a science book before doing that victory dance.
Source:
Twitter/@robtevis
41. Thatโs quite poetic
Something tells me that Dad thought long and hard about the way he wanted to give this advice. He settled for a particularly elegant way and seemed pretty proud of it.
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Twitter/@Lucky_Lefty28
42. Dad, do you need to talk?
Why do I get the feeling Dad is still bitter about that $200 he lost to the neighbor Tim back in 2003? Sometimes, dad advice comes from a dark past. You might want to ask some questions.
Source:
Twitter/@ALCooLJ
43. He covered everything
Both of these phrases apply to driving safety and physical attraction. I guess Dad was a man of few words โ but he made all of them count.
Source:
Twitter/@wesley_graham
44. A surefire plan
In case you didnโt know, that acronym stands for โThe Fault in Our Stars,โ which is a real tearjerker. And honestlyโฆthis isnโt the worst advice in the world. John Green would approve.
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Twitter/@austinmancini
45. Well, there you go
At least Dad isnโt concerned about his son marrying a divorced woman. He doesnโt care about baggage โ in fact, he thinks it comes with quite a few perks. Talk about putting a positive spin on things.
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Twitter/@zachhelton09
46. Yuck, but also solid advice
Do we want to know how Dad came to view this as life advice? No, we donโt. But suffice it to say, thereโs a story behind this and it was a tragedy.
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Twitter/@dmac3325
47. Take notes, kids
Every parent wants their kid to be good โ at least, for the most part. But this dad knew his daughter wasnโt always going to behave, so his advice had a Part II.
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Twitter/@ASinram
48. He didnโt want to go to the doctor
Ah, dads, the kings of telling their kids theyโre fine so they avoid going to the doctor. To be fair, this seems like an obvious solution to the problem.
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Twitter/@paulywood81
49. True, but unhelpful
In this dadโs defense, thatโs the first rule of getting poison ivy or poison oak. But he left out quite a few more helpful solutionsโฆlike calamine lotion.
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Twitter/@hollywoodheffne
50. Well, I get what heโs sayingโฆ
Dads are great at finding the most disturbing or disgusting ways of imparting great life advice. This is just the slightly grosser way of saying, โDonโt treat people badly because you might need their help one day.โ
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Twitter/lady_reade
51. Something tells me Dad hated swimming
Forget telling your kids their fingers will look like prunes. This dad had a more extreme saying that probably spoiled swimming for his kids for the rest of their lives.
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Twitter/@CoachOrts
52. Gross
Good old Dad, giving advice as colorful as possible. Itโs good advice, but it might not be the best to share in polite company. Keep it between dad and son.
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Twitter/@F34Novello
53. Use a washcloth
Do people exist who wash their entire body by rubbing a bar of soap directly on their skin? I guess this is good advice if youโre going to do that, but for the love, people, use a loofah.
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Twitter/@dvideostor
54. Cs get degrees
This dad seems to get it: you can be extremely intelligent and still be terrible at taking exams. When that happens โ and it happens to all of us โ itโs up to you to fudge your way through as best you can.
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Twitter/@thegreenbows
55. Okay, thatโs one option
Most dads try to encourage their kids through their troubles, but this one wasnโt pulling any punches. I sincerely hope he was using a bit of ill-timed dark humor.
Source:
Twitter/@phillipmtill
56. Noted
I feel as though there shouldโve been a second part to this lesson that said: โAlso, donโt go to hookers.โ Someone, please tell me there was a second part.
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Twitter/@terrylancaster
57. Thank you, but Iโm confused
Iโll be honest: Iโve read through this at least five times and still donโt understand the phrases โalligator mouthโ and โparakeet ass.โ But his message is clear.
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Twitter/@sarahgurt
58. Itโs gross but it rhymes
This clever method of excusing a belch doesnโt quite replace the phrase โExcuse me.โ Also, someone needs to tell Dad thatโs not how gas works.
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Twitter/@jordannextpaige
59. That isnโt true
This is a popular urban legend that just doesnโt seem to die. Dear Dad and everyone: no, they wonโt let you die just to get your organs nor will they take them while youโre alive.
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Twitter/@ericamyharris
60. At least, you shouldnโt
Iโm sure thereโs wisdom somewhere in this confusing Dad saying. Is he saying that picking your nose is preferable to having friends? Or is he saying you should be able to wipe your friends on the couch?
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Twitter/@Cheetar16505083
61. A new take on stranger danger
Most parents make sure their children know all about strangers, but this dad had a different bit of advice. Hopefully, he said it when his kids were old enough to understand it was a joke.
Source:
Twitter/@Emaruiz728
62. You canโt be too careful
Sure, itโs important to be cautious when youโre dating, especially if youโre meeting through a dating app or website. This might be overkill. But I donโt think he cares.
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Twitter/@CareBarrett6
63. See you in jail
Not only is this advice completely illogical, but itโs also extremely unsafe. If he ascribes to this, I wonder how many speeding tickets heโs gotten in his life.
Source:
Twitter/@awackerjacks77
64. Iโm not going to do that
Is this a dad joke disguised as advice or advice disguised as a dad joke? Weโll never know, but he loved to say it.
Source:
Twitter/@jaymcart
65. Well, Iโm never eating vegetables again
This might be an appealing thought for little boys, but not so much for little girls. You might be scaring your daughter off from eating anything green for fear of turning into a hairy monster.
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Twitter/@KatieLCurry
66. That just changed my life
If youโre okay with everyone thinking youโre an idiot, this is some life-changing advice. It could be a one-way ticket that allows you to sit on the couch for the rest of your days.
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Twitter/@KimAllison67
67. Heโs got his priorities straight
In many public campsites, itโs illegal to consume alcohol. That helps cut back on irresponsible behavior, waste, and excess noise. But Dad doesnโt care โ he wants to make sure his daughter parties it up.
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Twitter/@shania_8716
68. In other words, shut up
This is a brilliant way to keep your kids from babbling too much. Itโs a better method than telling them youโre playing the โQuiet Game.โ
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Twitter/@doridoodle1
69. Well, that clears it up
Some dads are optimists, telling their kids to shoot for the stars. This dad has a much more negative view of โ well, everything. I guess a dose of reality can be healthy.
Source:
Twitter/@princessjess121
70. First things first
We donโt know where this family lived, but it sounds as though they mightโve been in a place where hurricanes or tornadoes are common. But Dad wasnโt worried about his family โ he wanted to save his guitars.
Source:
Twitter/@glanceadrianna
71. Patrick Senior was a harsh man
At first, this reads as a warning to always take responsibility for your mistakes, which is mature advice. But the second line is a real kicker. Sorry, Patrick.
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Twitter/@pattyhebru
72. Thatโs quite the mental image
This is a rather harsh way to teach your kids that wishes donโt always come true. In true Dad form, he managed to find the most visceral way to say it.
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Twitter/@torycolumbusoh
73. Thatโs a wise man
Forget your MLM cure-all essential oils, Karen. This dad knows exactly which oils are essential to his needs, and they donโt include eucalyptus, sage, or lavender.
Source:
Twitter/@katiekesler15
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