Can you imagine if everyone could read your Google search history? Grandma can.

It looks like she’s having some pet stain issues, so we hope she found a way to clean that up AND remember the difference between a text and a search.

It’s very sweet to offer grandma help with her new iPhone.

Just know that she’s going to need to take you up on it, often. That is if she can manage to cry for help.

Once grandma masters the art of texting, prepare for a narrative history of her whole day.

And get ready for baby pressure over text message.

What’s more confusing – getting cut out newspaper clippings in the mail or a dead scorpion?

Someone is about to find out.

Texting with grandma is a good way to get disowned.

Don’t people know better than to insult grandma in a way she can keep permanently and use to guilt you forever?

Amateurs.

If you think grandma’s got better stuff to do than stalk you on all of your social media accounts so she can judge and worry about you and then express her concerns in writing, think again.

Remember that next time you post something online.

We like that grandma needed to prove just how chill she is with a photo.

But hey, she can text AND selfie – she’s got skills!

Grandma is down with the lingo.

Watch out before she starts making up her own acronyms.

CYG – that means “call your grandma.”

If you’re not there to hear grandma and grandpa talk about how much they don’t get popular culture, don’t worry.

Grandma will be happy to recount the entire conversation to you over text.

Also, she seems to think a lot of people are idiots.

Someone needs to show grandma how to hit the “back” button so she can text the right person.

Or invent a phone that can guess who you’re trying to text based on what you write.

Ok, to be fair, those emojis are tiny and it’s hard to see which one you’re hitting sometimes.

That or grandma secretly wants to flip you off.

Well, to be fair, we didn’t know that.

One thing we sometimes need to explain to grandparents is that getting random texts throughout the day can be distracting.

Next time grandma complains about how young people just don’t know how to concentrate anymore, remind her of this text.

Wow, grandma lost the plot pretty quickly on that happy birthday message.

But hope you had a great day nontheless!

Geez, grandma, way to bring down the mood.

We’re not sure if she is just as concerned with how classes went as she is with her brother’s death or if she just wanted to make sure her grandchild was there and paying attention before she dropped the news.

It’s never a good idea to get gossipy over text. It’s not just grandmas who send the message to the wrong person.

Luckily, this one dodged that bullet.

Hm. Well, we guess it’s better than not liking the phone, right?

We just want to know what word it’s autocorrecting.

Ok, to be fair, she could be on an iPad.

But it does seem suspicious.

We are also unable to handle this reply, but for a totally different reason.

Is grandma trolling the spammers or just really keen to share dog photos?

Ok, the thing about online acronyms is that we all agree that they can only mean one thing.

Grandma doesn’t get to make up her own.

Either grandma has a virus or she’s been searching for some things you don’t want to know about.

Best not to ask.

Well, if she saw it on TV it must be true, right?

Grandma just wants to keep you safe, after all.

Just because it’s an electronic device doesn’t mean it can do everything, grandma.

But sure, just give me your printer’s phone number.

Before grandma breaks out the White-Out, maybe someone should show her the delete button.

She’ll be pleasantly surprised to know she doesn’t have to send every message she types.

Well, either grandma thinks you’re Google or she needs to learn to use it.

Then again, maybe she knows you’ll give her a better answer than the Internet.

Just remember to tell her she doesn’t have to feel scandalized by a poke if it doesn’t occur IRL.

Does grandma think you’re going to read all that and attempt to decipher it?

Yes.

Again, it’s time to show her that little back button with the X on it. It’ll be her best friend. And yours.

Grandmas are always thinking of you at random points during the day.

And sometimes they let you know in very strange ways.

Well, technically that’s a selfie, so she’s not wrong.

We’re just confused as to why she thinks anyone needs to see this photo.

Go, grandma!

Sometimes an accidental text means you get some unexpected moral support from grandma.

But she might need to watch some less violent television because we’re concerned she might actually get out her crowbar.

Well at this point, we’d just leave her in there as FoxyLlama. Or FoxyGrandma.

Also, that’s a cruel yet brilliant party prank.

Spacebars are overrated anyway (although they’re really large buttons, so we’re not sure how you miss it).

Instead, just gear up for the challenge of deciphering one-word texts.

First, it’s almost everyone’s pet peeve when someone asks if they can ask you something. Just spit it out!

Second, we really want to know if cotton candy is family slang or an autocorrect.

If it’s the latter, do we want to know what she was calling Nicki Minaj?

Literally no one:

Grandma: Here’s what I think about everything…

Grandma takes her cooking seriously if she needs to check in on your meal preferences before you get there.

But not seriously enough to name your glop.

Alive and screaming.

To be fair, capital letters are a lot easier to see.

On the other hand, just how often do you have to check in before you get a guilt trip? Sheesh.

On this day in history, you were born – and also Hitler took power. Coincidence?

Either way, we sure hope that sweater fits.

Well isn’t that nice?

Grandma will be thinking of you every time she sits on the toilet.

Those emojis really are hard to see.

Also, does grandma realize that text messages are more private than Facebook messages?

Apparently, grandma was thinking about the day you were conceived.

That or she just really doesn’t want to forget to wish you a happy birthday.

We can only hope it’s the latter.

Grandma is going to be efficient and just fill you in on everything while she’s at it.

But we’d still like to know about those puppies.

Grandma would like you to change your profile photo back to something she likes.

Grandma doesn’t get the concept of personal choice.

We appreciate the effort to use some slang, but you also have to learn how to use it.

Better luck next time, grandma.

It’s better to just show grandma where to get her emojis next time you see her rather than explain it in a text.

Then again, once she starts she may never stop.

Looks like grandma has lowered her expectations to avoid disappointment.

On the bright side, this gives her a reason to be proud of you.

We think grandma’s margaritas were a little too strong.

Hope she had a designated driver!

What is it with grandmas and judging people by their looks?

We think Lorde is really beautiful, but apparently, grandma thinks she needs to gussy up a bit.

Does grandma think the phone has a mind of its own? Or does she think it can read her mind?

Either way, enjoy explaining autocorrect. You might want to tell her she can turn it off.

Hey, everyone finds their new phones confusing at first.

But this grandma’s got it down enough to send back an appropriate reply – and that’s really half the battle.

What if we told Grandma that workmanship has nothing to do with one’s religion.

Do you think her head would explode?

We will pass on the free mature sex.

Thanks anyway, grandma.

Thanksgiving just isn’t the same without potato peels.

Don’t worry about missing the holiday because you’ll get all the details.

Well, at least this grandma is straightforward about her desire to be entertained and doesn’t couch it in meaningless questions.

But shouldn’t she have learned to entertain herself by now? After all, she has the entire Internet in the palm of her hands!

Grandma’s really got this texting thing figured out.

She’ll send you a letter all about it.

We thought patience was a virtue.

Can’t grandma wait to see if the phone is going to autocorrect before sending that next message?

Apparently not.

Grandma has given up on waiting for your reply and is just asking and answering her own questions now.

Better hurry up with that RSVP next time.

There’s really no autocorrecting that mess.

There are some real words in there, so we’re pretty confused about how this monstrosity happened.

Only grandma could send something like this.