They say God works in mysterious ways. Sometimes it’s by making you do a double-take or even giving you a good laugh. While the Big Guy certainly doesn’t make his own church signs, the men and women who do have found some clever ways to draw people’s attention.
Haven’t been to church in a while? Are you an Easter and Christmas patron? Apparently, the church notices and they’re calling you out! They’re also eager to play to a youth demographic and even remind people to tone down the “us vs. them” rhetoric in favor of loving one another. Whatever they’re doing, there’s no doubt that the places of worship that put up these signs have a sense of humor.
From guilt trips to puns to (hopefully?) unintentionally hilarious double meanings, these signs will no doubt brighten your day.
1. Moses was a basket case
Sometimes you have to simultaneously chuckle and groan at the attempts at humor. But it’s certainly true that we can all turn our lives around as long as we don’t give up.
The Bible says a lot of things about the need for devotion, but it says even more about the key to eternal life being personal growth. So more fruit, and less nuts is one way of putting it, we guess.
3. A PSA and church sign all in one
Texting while driving can be deadly. But it’s worth noting that you shouldn’t take your eyes off the road to read long church signs either.
Asking us to be as loveable as our pets find us is setting a pretty ambitious goal. Who’s up for the challenge?
Did someone really steal an air conditioner from a church? We’re not sure, but it looks like the management is less forgiving than God might be.
We’re big fans of this sign. We guess the Good Place really is a lot harder to get into, plus it involves cardio!
7. Switch prayers, please
To be honest, that’s not much snow. But it looks like this church has better things to do than shovel, so they’d like you to pray for some better weather.
To be fair, not much else needs to be said. The real message doesn’t fit on a sign.
A church sign for the Apple generation. To be fair, Adam and Eve both got more straightforward instructions than we do with our iPhones.
A straightforward and simple message that it’s misguided to judge other people, but still one that makes you think “wait, what?”
What can we say, food is always going to get people’s attention.
A great reminder that it’s not your job to sort people into categories of good and bad.
13. Forgive (and mess with) your enemies
A reminder that foriving people is the perfect solution – it frees you from stress and anger and still leaves room for your enemies to wonder how you manage to be so virtuous.
It appears to be a real sign. If you don’t have a dirty mind, it might take you a minute to get it. If you do have a dirty mind, you’ll wonder how anyone could miss the double meaning here.
15. We never thought about that
Termites have been around for 250 million years. Granted, that messes with the biblical dating system, but if you believe there was an arc at some point that held two of every creature, there would have been termites aboard.
It’s hard to get a laugh out of a teenager, but this church is trying.
17. Hotter than Hell, Part 2
The people who come up with church signs sure do have a lot to say about the weather.
It sounds like a high school cheer, but it’s some pretty clever play with letters if you ask us. Do you feel guilty yet?
19. We still live in the real world
Just a friendly reminder that there are other eyes on your behavior and they don’t have to wait until you’re dead to punish you.
No one has ever claimed the Westboro Baptist Church is full of loving souls. But this church is taking the claim one step further and it’s cracking us up.
21. Not exactly an endorsement
Insomniacs, we’ve found the perfect church for you!
22. Religion meets pop culture
Even Darth Vadar is hinting that you need to go to church more often. Now that’s intimidating!
23. Santa and God are both active in December
Afraid that Santa will find out you’re naughty? That’s the least of your problems!
24. Multiple ways to save
Saving souls is a lot harder than saving money. This church wants you to know that your Sunday Walmart shopping should probably take place
after church services.
If these two are connected, that explains a lot about city traffic.
If God can forgive your trip to Vegas, you should probably take him up on that. Chances are your partner may not be as forgiving.
How many people who saw this sign got the pop music reference?
28. That escalated quickly
Grabbing the nearest garden hose will do just fine. No need to waste holy water on trespassers.
For those of you who only visit twice a year at most, this church wants you to know they are actually open year-round.
We just hope this church has a rec room for yoga classes.
Best to fix your problems the right way if you’re not going to burn any calories running from them.
32. Drop it like it’s hot
Ok, they may have gotten a bit too cheesy here, but you get the point.
33. So much better than dial-up
Luckily, new wireless technology is improving prayer service instead of eating up all that extra data from your plan.
We’re not sure young folks even know who Maury Povich is anymore, but this sign is clearly meant to get a laugh out of daytime tv watchers.
We guess this church ran out of clever things to say, so they just got right to the point.
But that doesn’t mean a church can’t hold a good ice cream social.
We think that’s called The Rapture and we’re not quite ready for it yet, so let’s all be on our best behavior for now. Deal?
38. So what is his last name?
He’s like Cher or Madonna, except all-knowing.
Sinning is easy, but beware the eternal aftermath.
We’re guessing someone got fired for that. There aren’t any other meanings we can think of that could explain missionary
position. But we’re grateful for the chuckle, nontheless.
We’re not sure what cats’ bad attitudes have to do with going to church, but this sign couldn’t be any more spot on.
Our cod is an awesome cod will have even the non-believers laughing if they’ve ever heard the song.
So much for dieting, just wait for dying!
Prepare to see a lot of Ugg boots at this church in the Fall.
This guys face really makes the photo. Clearly the church was referring to prayer, but we can’t help but let our minds wander elsewhere. How long do you think this sign stayed up?
God can’t cure your wrinkles, but a plastic surgeon can’t cure your soul.
We have to admit that this is pretty hysterical. No one wants to speak ill of the dead. It’s so much easier if you don’t force people to come up with lies for your eulogy.
We can just picture hipster Jesus with his thick-rimmed glasses and mocha latte.
49. That’s what it’s all about
Again, we’re not sure what your hokey pokey obsession has to do with all this, but church does aim to turn you around.
It’s a good thing Satan doesn’t leave Yelp reviews.
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They say God works in mysterious ways. Sometimes it’s by making you do a double-take or even giving you a good laugh. While the Big Guy certainly doesn’t make his own church signs, the men and women who do have found some clever ways to draw people’s attention.
Haven’t been to church in a while? Are you an Easter and Christmas patron? Apparently, the church notices and they’re calling you out! They’re also eager to play to a youth demographic and even remind people to tone down the “us vs. them” rhetoric in favor of loving one another. Whatever they’re doing, there’s no doubt that the places of worship that put up these signs have a sense of humor.
From guilt trips to puns to (hopefully?) unintentionally hilarious double meanings, these signs will no doubt brighten your day.