This dude really got Michael Jackson shaved into his head. Wow… just, wow. His hair is a thriller.

Whoa there, that’s some huge hair. I’m not sure whether Elvis would be impressed, embarrassed, or outright ashamed. That’s one wicked hairdo.

The flat top is so 90s. Let me introduce you to the flat cap. It’s like if a flat top met a baseball cap. Your thoughts?

Well, this one’s pretty self-explanatory. But seriously, what he’s thinking?! This has to be for the laughs. It’s obviously modeled after a rat.

It looks like he’s growing a mustache on his forehead. Or maybe he’s part bull? Either way, I can’t fathom what I’m looking at.

That half-smile makes it all the more hilarious. I can’t tell if he’s oblivious to the fact that it looks horrendous (and hilarious), or if he’s in on the joke. Either way, he’s a brave guy. Or at least a bold one.

These are knockoff cornrows. There’s no other way to put it. He clearly took a buzzer and ran some rows across his head. It’s hilarious and sad all at the same time.

I can get behind the idea. I can even get behind the color. But the final result? I’m not sure I can get behind that.

Bald eagles are majestic creatures. They’re also not technically bald. I’m not sure anybody can take this guy seriously.

Check out starboy over here. Like his haircut legitimately resembles a star. Or something you’d see in a Nintendo game. It’s precise, no doubt.

Batman may very well be the greatest American superhero ever invented. He even inspired this bold haircut. I kinda like the wings.

This looks like something a member of a boy band in the early 2000s would have done but taken to the worst extreme. The front of his hair legitimately looks like a conglomeration of icicles. I like his smiley face cutout.

Is this how you hair? Never fall asleep around people you don’t trust. And never fall asleep around that wily, wildcard friend. You never know what could happen.

Is this still technically a mullet? It’s short in the front and ridiculous in the back. Unlike the average mullet, this will definitely never catch on.

He’s got a strong signal. Feel free to connect your laptop or mobile device to his hair. He’s just just a huge tech nerd.

Some people would kill for that hairline. He just doesn’t know how to use it properly. I’m not sure the barber does either. The slogan on his bib is next level.

I’m almost certain he’s basing his style off of legendary shonen animé character Goku from Dragon Ball Z. If you’re familiar with the character, you can probably see the ridiculous resemblance. Props for putting yourself out there.

Apparently not just Spongebob. I guess this guy technically isn’t under the sea, but he might as well be. His hair looks like a literal pineapple. That’s amazing. Just when you thought you’ve seen it all…

He looks up to his big brother. Big Brother has no idea how influential he is. Perhaps too influential… This ain’t a good look.

Genius comes in many forms. Here, it’s manifested in a hair-face on the back of this brilliant man’s head. It almost looks real.

What the hell is going on here? That single pigtail just ain’t it. And what’s with the pink tips? My eyes. They burn. She does not look enthused.

Is that a large beaver hanging from this man’s head? Oh wait, that’s just his insane hair. The end legitimately looks like a boot.

That’s… not a good look. Pardon my crudeness, but it kinda resembles male genitalia. She’s had that mortified expression ever since her new haircut. Poor thing.

That’s some bad hair. There’s no other way to slice it. This hair is legitimately gravity-defying.

Her smile indicates that she knows something we don’t. Maybe she just knows how absurd her haircut really is. Like, the purple’s cool… but the giant bald center?

Some people like to switch it up. But what happens when bangs go wrong? Yikes. They’re clearly not even straight.

That’s one hard part. The hard part about this hard part is that it looks hideous. That was actually surprisingly easy for me to say.

He clearly modeled his absurd hair after a tennis ball. Did he pull it off? You be the judge.

Does he think his hair looks good? Really? There’s no way he actually likes the way his hair looks. The glasses and the hair make him look pretty pretentious.

We all know the flat top. But have you seen the plateau top? This thing’s reaching new heights each and every day.

I like that he’s mixing it up. I do. But the direction he took… This is well off the beaten path. His hair resembles brown icicles.

I’m not sure what to say. This is like a modern art piece. I heard her next project features Ken.

His kid certainly has his eyes. But I hope to everything that he never has his hair. Is Dad’s hair even real?

Danny DeVito is an icon. Have you ever seen One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest? What about It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia? If this kid’s game was to imitate Danny, he did a fantastic job.

His hair looks as if he pulled a headband over his head. It’s like a frame for his face. At least he can just shave off the rest to make it look… normal.

A little snip can go a long way. But you have to remove your scrap hair… Notice how most of the worst haircuts feature unnecessary baldness?

This hair defies the laws of gravity. This is what Super Saiyan Vegeta would look like in real life. Okay maybe I’m the one who’s out of line now.

His head legitimately looks like a yellow tennis ball. He would fit right in on The Simpsons, too. The hair itself, though… I’m not even sure what I’m looking at. It’s that egregious.

I’ve never seen such a flat top. The curvature really adds some spunk. I wonder how many bottles of gel this guy goes through each day.

Yep, he got a haircut that looks like a hairnet. Now, he’s an honorary lunch lady. That rat tail is hideous.

His hair resembles Saturn’s iconic rings. Except his hair’s not nearly as breathtaking. It kinda looks like a crown of sorts, too.

Seriously, what are we looking at right now? He’d have an otherwise normal haircut. But he had to get cute, causing him to get less cute.

This is relatively tame compared to what we’ve seen so far. But I don’t like it. Not one bit. I wonder if he does. This looks like what a rockstar would look like without any sense of style.

This guy’s facial hair and head hair are at war. They’re fighting over who’s more hideous. The whole ensemble is quite the sight, for better or (mostly) worse.

Upon first glance, you may be led to believe this man has an animal on his head. But look closer. That’s his actual hair. So… yeah.

Why’s he smiling? Does he think his new cut actually looks good? Does he have eyes? Why am I asking so many questions?

Bald patches don’t look good. It’s gotta stop. This has gotten out of hand. You either go bald or don’t go bald. There is no in-between.

Humans don’t have tails. But this guy’s head does. He shaved everything except his ponytail. And it was a bad idea and he should feel bad.

Pardon my crudeness (again), but this guy’s hair legitimately looks like feces. He took a figurative dump all over himself by deciding to get this cut. People say he smells weird, but it’s just his hair.

Well, there you have it – a remotely sane haircut. This haircut isn’t out of this world. It’s just bad. Like, really bad.