If you’re trying to make friends with the staff and make it your mission to catch them at the bar, you could be in for a loooong wait.

The crew that works on the ship typically has their own bar where they can drink for cheap and away from prying passengers.

It’s common for crew members and passengers “in-the-know “to call the most oblivious passengers on the ship “traffic cones.”

These are the people who have no clue what they’re doing and think the world should stop around them while they figure things out. They stop in busy areas while they make a decision and expect everyone to just suddenly walk around them.

Just keep in mind how annoying you would find that behavior and pull yourself aside and out of the way if you need to get your bearings.

As was mentioned before, the crew gets their own bar, and that’s where the party begins when they’re not on shift.

And like any other group of service employees who are hassled by entitled people wondering where their free stuff is all day, they need to blow off some steam.

That means, when the crew bar closes for the night, you may see them getting rowdy on the deck and in stairwells or a friend’s quarters. So if you see them nursing a hangover the next day, have some mercy.

This one may sound a bit obvious, but when you’re stuck on a ship at sea with thousands of other strangers, things happen and tempers get short.

If you do happen to get into a physical altercation or even get angry and end up making a threat (to anyone!), the captain has the ability to kick you off the ship at the next port without a refund or a way home.

Anything could happen out at sea. Your best bet is to purchase travel insurance which will reimburse you for any unforeseen emergency costs you have to pay while on your trip.

Just be sure to keep all of your receipts and look for insurance that’s truly comprehensive. In this case, you may want to consult with a travel agent instead of just buying a cruise with a Groupon and no one to go to for assistance.

Drinks on cruise ships aren’t cheap. That’s why some people try to sneak on their own booze. That might be fine if you’re buying wine in a port town, but be careful about low-rent tricks like filling water bottles with tequila.

If you’re sneaking on your own alcohol against rules (which you should read in detail), security can and will kick you off if they catch you doing something illegal, and you can be sure that they won’t be generous about refunding you. You may also have to figure out how to fly to your departure destination with said alcohol (it will need to go in checked baggage, so pack carefully for the plane ride).

If you’re on a cruise and want a good glass of wine, one rule of thumb is that it’s usually cheaper to buy the bottle.

Ship captains are pretty weary of people sucking up to them (since everyone does it), but many cruise ships let you go “behind the scenes” and meet the crew as long as they’re not in the process of maneuvering in or out of port.

So, go say hi, and you never know – maybe you’ll see the captain or engineer at the bar later and they’ll tell you the next one’s on the house.

Just be polite and not annoying. They also need a break from their jobs when they’re off work.

Cruise ships can carry thousands of passengers. Because of this, poolside seats can sometimes be hard to come by. However, most ships have adult-only areas and these spots are usually much less crowded. (Let’s just say those photos of a couple quietly enjoying a poolside drink are the stuff of fantasy.)

No one can bring kids up there, so it’s generally quieter. Then again, while the kids are away, people still do tend to get rowdy!

The sooner you can make it to specialty food areas, such as the sushi bar, you better off you’ll be. These are the stations where things are specially made for you.

These lines get incredibly long as mealtime wears on though. After a while, you may have to just settle for the buffet.

First of all, plenty of people have perfect cruise vacations without worrying about any of this stuff. Then, of course, there are the nightmare cruises – and you can’t predict them.

Germs are spread easily during cruises due to the high volume of people in relatively confined spaces, the plethora of high-touch areas, shared pools, etc.

Be sure to bring all your immune system boosters on board with you and practice good hygiene! If you do get sick and become feverish or otherwise seem to have something contagious, you may be pulled aside from the fun to reduce the risk of infecting others. (And isn’t that what you’d want them to do with other sick passengers so they don’t infect you?)

Hopefully, this is something that you’ll never have to deal with, but most cruise ships don’t offer any way to provide dental care while onboard.

So, if you’re someone who has multiple fillings, crowns, or bridgework, and you feel a toothache coming on before you embark, you probably want to check in with your own dentist before you leave!

Be sure to read the fine print, especially when it comes to meals and drinks on board a cruise ship. If you need a special meal or order fancy drinks, those may not be included in the “all-inclusive” base fare. Heck, they probably charge for Wi-Fi!

If you’re one to overindulge on vacation, you should keep an eye out for notices about extra fees that get tacked on to your bill at the end, especially when it comes to alcohol.

And gratuities (as in tips for wait staff) are never included – so bring cash for tips!

Of course, it never hurts to ask questions if you’re being offered something special but are concerned about paying for it. Then you can feel free to live it up without worry!

No one likes to cancel their plans, but sometimes other things in life come up.

Let’s put COVID aside, which sometimes led to modified rules. But, in general, cruise companies make it extremely difficult to get a full refund.

Some require cancelation to take place at least 120 days before the scheduled trip, or only let you cancel in writing, or consider certain fees non-refundable.

Be careful if you’ve planned a honeymoon cruise as well since name changes that don’t match up to ship documentation can lead to a surprise cancellation from the other side!

In other words, you may want to invest in good travel insurance if you’re not confident that you’ll get your money back in case of an emergency or snafu.

Are you planning on taking a cruise with a large group? Perfect. Most cruise liners will throw in discounts and free rooms as an incentive to book more tickets. That tends to bring the price down for everyone.

Of course, you don’t have to do everything with that group once you’re aboard.

Understanding correct gratuity amounts can be confusing, especially in other countries.

Some cruise ships will take care of that for you, but they’ll do it by charging it directly to your account (and you’ve probably signed away your right to easily decline that option).

You may look into whether or not a cruise line offers the ability to prepay a gratuity amount in advance.

But you’re not going to get away with not tipping properly.

After spending hours or days time on a crowded ship, you probably can’t wait to get off and get some space.

However, sometimes the crowded ports are just as bad as the ship, AND you have to pay for everything.

One option is to hang back on the ship and enjoy the amenities while you have them to yourself.

Cruise ship lecturers used to be treated like royalty, but gone are those days. However, if you happen to have a field of speciality or interesting experience, lecturers do still typically get some sweet deals, including nicer suites and better food and service.

Of course, don’t just grab a microphone in the lounge because you have a PhD. You have to work through a talent agent to get these sweet gigs.

If you want to hit the spa but not break the bank, try waiting until the ship is at a port. The spas will usually offer discounts for treatments during this time and be far less packed!

Alcohol and soft drinks will usually cost you, as will most juice. Be sure you know what kind of drinks are included in your package before you head for refreshments.

Most cruise lines also charge for bottled water that you’ll find in your mini-fridge or on the menu. And they rarely allow you to bring your own bottled water on board anymore.

One of the oldest tricks in the book to cure seasickness while onboard a ship is to stare at the horizon.

Looking at a fixed point (and that’s the only one when you’re out at sea!) can help you cope with the constant rocking and of the boat and get your stomach feeling alright again.

Another way to combat seasickness is to eat green apples and plain crackers. Lots of crew members will swear by this remedy and you may even see bowls of green apples sitting around.

If that doesn’t work, you can always get some seasickness meds from the onboard doctor.

Remember how you can get kicked off the ship at the next port for fighting?

Well, if you pose any kind of threat while you’re still at sea, you may get locked up in the brig for your safety and the safety of others. Basically, it’s sea jail. And we hear the food isn’t great.

Most doors on cruise ships don’t actually lock in case of an emergency. But there are ways to secure them so people don’t just come barging in.

Go ahead and ask if your cabin door will have a secure lock (such as a deadbolt). You may even want to invest in a doorstop if you want a bit more security – just keep in mind that if there is an emergency, people won’t be able to get in and help.

This one is a bit morbid, but death can’t be predicted. In case someone passes away while onboard the ship, there is a morgue on board to store the bodies. They may even be large enough to hold multiple bodies if the cruise company caters to the elderly.

Just don’t do looking for that room.

Cruise ships don’t just cost a lot for the passengers, but they are also expensive to maintain.

For example, just crossing the Panama canal could cost the ship upwards of $300,000!