Some days start off the wrong way right from the beginning. Before you even leave your home in the morning you are wondering if it would be safer to just stay in.
Then there are the days that seem to start okay but just go downhill from there. Sometimes you can laugh about your misfortune. Maybe not right then, but a while later. Sometimes you may never be able to look back and laugh.
But the rest of us watching? We’re laughing. But we’re not mean. We’re laughing with you—even if you can’t do it yourselves—not at you.
1. Think again!
What would you do? Would you eat a slice of cake that says die? Especially a slice that your mother-in-law just cut for you.
2. It’ll get better.
I’ll get home, and my cat will be thrilled to see me. His joy will pull me out of my depressed state. Or not.
3. Somebody needs to have a talk with Gary.
Really, is that the kind of thing you need to express across the sky for the world to see. Oh wait, it should say Gary loves Doris.
4. Oh! Oww!
I would never even think that such a thing could happen. How does your eyelid get stuck in your zipper?
5. Burn.
Yes, I agree. This wasn’t thought through. The poor guy, though. He probably thought he had a chance if things were going well up until she looked at his bank balance.
6. I see a do over.
It’s actually kind of cute and depending on the owner they make it to leave it that way. Because, come on, how many people can say they have Footprints in their driveway.
7. At least he smiling.
Imagine this, you order a new guitar. But by the time it arrives, you’ve lost two fingers in a work-related accident.
8. Just grab it and run.
Seriously, if you had to pick up a package at the post office that was wrapped in a way that makes it look like this, I wouldn’t even try to explain. I would sign for it and run. It’s a blackhead remover, by the way!
9. Well, that’s disgusting.
And I mean the state of the toilet. However horrifying it would be to find a snake in your toilet, I think the real problem is how dirty it is.
10. Where did you leave it?
How can someone be mad at the squirrel for taking your food? Unless it broke into your house and took it. If it was outside, it is free game in my book.
11. World traveler
When your phone goes missing, but then it’s found. Except you are in London, and a week later you get an alert saying it’s a world away.
12. Well, the lawn is clean.
No, you should never put dish soap in the dishwasher. You get nightmare proportion suds… right out to the street, apparently.
13. Roll with it.
Little kids typically aren’t cruel—at least not until adults teach them to be. So if a little kid complements you on your Minion costume, when it’s just your regular, everyday clothes, take it as a compliment.
14. Here’s a tip.
Don’t believe everything you read on the Internet. Yes, turmeric is good for your skin, but it will also stain your skin. And the stain will last for days.
15. Oh, my.
I can’t even imagine having to clean that up. At least that isn’t what it looks like. This is just the case of leaving the doggie door open during a bad storm, and it bringing mud into the house.
16. 2020 just keeps getting better.
At least he didn’t pay money to have his lips look like that. No, he got stung by a bee while unpacking Christmas decorations.
17. Some days are like that.
First, there’s the open sandwich that gets dropped in the parking lot. Then there’s a pot of pasta, which slips and spills all over the floor. Making the second pot, the handle breaks off the pot. It’s time to start crying.
18. A little bit of privacy.
Getting a text like that would be horrible at any time. Getting it when it’s on view to the world would be even much worse.
19. That’s going to suck.
Imagine your phone hanging out of the car by the charger. Bouncing along on the pavement. This is when a really good case is necessary.
20. Keep one in the car.
I’ve only made it as far as the car before realizing I didn’t have a mask. This person drove 45 minutes to store thinking they had one in their pocket. It was a baby sock.
21. The one on the right.
When you have to spend the day at work in two different shoes. Only because you put both on in order to get your wife’s opinion on which one you should wear.
22. Midnight snack attack.
Well, this didn’t go as planned. Imagine getting up in the middle of the night to get something from the fridge and the door coming off in your hand. Dreamland will have to wait.
23. All it needs is a rainbow sticker.
I’m always careful when getting new plates. Because things like this could happen.
24. The City of Love.
For a special anniversary, why not visit Paris, the city of love. Then celebrate on the Eiffel Tower. What a view!
25. The harvest is in.
How disheartening. You try to grow potatoes for the first time, and after waiting 10 weeks your harvest yields this.
26. That’s not pigeon poop.
All it takes is one moment of inattention. Like moving the ladder, forgetting that the paint tray is still sitting at the top.
27. That’s very cool looking.
Or at least it would look cool, if it wasn’t broken. You’re looking at a home-built PC, the crash an hour after completion. Crashed in a whole new way.
28. A once-in-a-lifetime moment.
There are places that you visit that you likely never returned to, so having a photo as a memento is important. Like this visit to Machu Picchu, and the photo his dad took of him.
29. Something is where it shouldn’t be.
If you look very closely in the groove between the trunk lid and the side of the car, you’ll see something silver. That’s the car key, now locked in there.
30. Oh, that’s bad.
This is a hole drilled into the side of a Martin guitar that costs between 4 and $5k US. The cable guy drilled a hole through the side of the house, into a closet, through the guitar case, and into the guitar.
31. Some mornings are like that.
You stumble into the bathroom, your eyes barely open, and grab the toothpaste. At least you thought it was the toothpaste.
32. Those things are disgusting.
Fly traps, I mean. And should you be so unfortunate to get one stuck in your hair, you’ll be well shampooing out the glue and fly guts that are stuck to it.
33. Such perfect aim.
You might be fooled into thinking that is cream on the lid of that coffee cup. You would be wrong. That is a crow leaving its mark.
34. Somebody didn’t get the memo.
To work in an office of 30 people, and for some reason you assume everybody is dressing up for Halloween. Only to find out that you are the only person who dressed up.
35. Making an impression.
We often hear about the importance of making a good first impression. This is her first yearbook photo from her first year as a teacher.
36. Order confirmation.
You know how you get a photo of your delivery as proof of its arrival? Door Dash left this as a delivery confirmation photo.
37. A morning wake me up.
This isn’t the way to start your day. Going to grind some pepper over your eggs and having the grinder break.
38. She’s so thin.
The crazy thing about this is people would do this deliberately. Get sick so that they could lose weight quickly.
39. Can you imagine opening the trunk and seeing this?
This is what happens when the paint store doesn’t properly seal the lid. It comes open, and in this case, spilled all over the back of the car.
40. And you can’t blame anyone.
Sometimes and you try to kid proof things, you make it worse. In this case, the flour was moved away from the child so he wouldn’t make a mess, but mom accidentally knocked it off the counter with her elbow.
41. I’ll just put it here.
Note that perfume bottle on the back of the toilet. Hubby bought it for his wife for Christmas, but she decided to use it there as air freshener.
42. I hope he wasn’t hurt.
And yes, I’m sure it sucks when you flip your tractor. I wonder what’s involved in getting them back on all wheels.
43. Not a fridge.
This is a costly mistake. Assuming that the previous owners of your home left a mini fridge behind in the basement, only to find out it is in fact a freezer.
44. I hope he didn’t pay a lot.
So he ordered himself a new smart phone online. However, what he received was that stone. I’m not sure how smart it is.
45. I didn’t know this could happen.
This is a wedding band that was dropped—along with something else—and cracked in two. Apparently if gold is cast, this can happen.
46. So you drag yourself out of bed.
Getting up is hard enough, but you push yourself to get up at 5. Only to find out it was all a giant waste of your time and energy.
47. That’s going to cost you.
Camera equipment is obnoxiously expensive. So to drop and break not just one, but two lenses, is not a good day.
48. That loose truck wheel must’ve been traveling.
Traveling with some velocity, that is. It smashed a hole in the wall before smashing the window and landing on top of that McLaren. An automobile that costs about $300,000. Hello, insurance premiums.
49. This will only happen at the worst possible time.
Not to imply there’s ever a good time for something like this to happen. This being breaking the connector that you charge your phone with.
50. Ironic.
Brand-new car, first tank of gas. And you do this. Run over a pair of needle nose pliers, only to have the handle pierce your tire and not needle.
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